[Mom - Actually, buddy, even though its a large, I couldn't get it over your big self any other way]
Some of you purists might notice that my jersey is #87, Ben Coates. Yes, yes, YES!! I know that he no longer plays for the Pats (jeez! I do read the sports, you know), but its the only jersey we have. Besides, I think it kinda suits me. After all, Ben Coates was a great tight end and, ahem... well... ladies?