Friday, February 15, 2008

Conspiracy Theory and other stuff

I have become fixated on the Westminster Kennel Club and the great Conspiracy of terriers to win more shows than anybody else. Thanks to the fact that I subscribe to Mental Floss I found a most interesting video about robots. Apparently, this prof stays at home and uses his robot to teach his classes. Its kind of creepy. I thought, maybe they do the same thing with the judges at Westminster. Maybe they aren't humans at all, but... ROBOTS! Robots controlled by... terriers! Sure enough, after much searching I found this extra double top secret photo taken in the Westminster sound booth! Busted!I knew it!!! The whole thing is rigged! I need to call the New York Times right away, but first... I ordered this most awesome toy in the mail!Yes, its a USB Hump Meister Dog ! I'm not going to bother to show you a video because if you go to YouTube and Google USB Humping Dog you can see several action movies. I only enjoyed it for a short time before Mom grabbed it to take to work to show off to all her urber geek friends.

Momma likes her work because she says it is a safe place for all those loser nerds like her to congregate. Whatever! It seems my new toy was a big hit and she has totally stolen it to keep at work because she and the uber geeks find it endlessly fascinating. Jeez!

I have to note that I lost some of my MANGOISTHEBESTDOGGIEINTHEWORLD points this morning. Its all because of Rocky the psycho attack miniature poodle. Usually when I see him I go into a sit stay and let him go all cracker dog at me without comment. But today he was really slinging the dirt and he made a comment about Momma that I could not let pass. So I started barking back at him and Momma had to grab my collar and hold me back and then I was a "bad dog." Sigh... if she knew what that stupid Rocky was saying she would have let me at him.

Finally, what's this monkey doing on my back?
Mango Man! Oh yeah.


Mack said...

Mental Floss rocks, doesn't it!

And my dad was gonna buy that humpmeister dog on but mom said NO WAY!!

Joe Stains said...

oh dog my Mom is one of those uber dorks and now she wants one of those humpy dogs. I still think you are the best dog in the world. ALSO to be sure I am not included in this, I am not a TRUE terrier, I am a terrier by name only.

MJ's doghouse said...

wow mango...i do love a dog that takes care of his mom....(yesterday) so you will always be my main humping dog is pretty cool...but my mom would not have a clue what to use it for...

Amber-Mae said...

Oh no! Those terriers! But I like that humpy dog. I saw one on Youtube before & i thought it was really cute but damn noisy!

Love licks,
Solid Gold Dancer

Biggie-Z said...

Hi Mango! When you have finished exposing the Terrier Conspiracy like Woodward and Bernstein, perhaps you should do an expose on the double standard for dog behavior. We, the (ahem) larger-sized dogs, must behave perfectly while little guys get to talk smack at us all they want. And we're just supposed to take it? What were we bred for? No one should talk to your Momma like that!

If I had points to give, I'd give them back to you.


Randi said...

Hi Mango...I am all for kindness & tolerance..but you just needed to let loose on that little guy...too bad you are being punished for that...Poor Mango... Pooooor Pooooooooor Mango....I agree with Biggie..if I had points, I'd give them all to you.

Love & Licks,

Noah the Airedale said...

Don't feel bad about the poodle. We understand how these thing can happen. We've had poodle moments here that have resulted in vet visits.......sigh. I think I've said enough about poodles!

Love the humping dog.

Hugs and tail wags
Noah Willow Tess & Lucy

Wimsey said...

Maria laughed so hard at the terriers, I don't understand why, it makes perfect sense and good for you for exposing them.

Sorry about the loss of points. Biggie's right, we bigger dogs always get in trouble if we defend our human's honor. Sigh, they aren't too bright, but I love 'em.


The Brat Pack said...

Maybe we'll put one of those dogs in Mom's stocking next year.

You shouldn't be in trouble for defending her honor!!


Lorenza said...

Hi, Mango!
Kisses and hugs

Scruffy & Lacie said...

Mango...Mumsie's pickin' herself off the floor at the pic of those foxy wires stackin' the points at Westminster. She can't stop giggling...we were surprised Charmin didn't get it, terrier and would be nice to see a big doggie like u the best doggie in the world win Westminster someday. You could slobber on the trophy! The bathroom is a no slobber zone??? I guess ur mom could slip and fall in it. (hmm...ewww...)

We caught up on the rest of ur bloggie...ur hilarious, Big Guy!!!

Still giggling...

triple terrier barks...
Scruffy, Lacie and Babystan

Sami said...

Hi Mango! You are such a big handsome strong dog! I enjoy reading about you the Mango Man!
Kisses & Licks,
AKA Golden Girl

Kirby said...

Hi Mango,

He he he, I like the humpmeister dog, he makes me laugh. I can't argue about the terriers, as I am one, so I guess I'm partial. Though, I think it would be so pawsome if a big dog like you would win.

Your pal,

Noah the Airedale said...

G'day matie,
Come by our blog, we've a little something for you.

Hugs and tail wags
Noah Willow Tess & Lucy