Sunday, July 20, 2008


Today has been one of the most boring days of my entire life!

It is so hot, that even with a very abbreviated walkie I was huffing and puffing like a locomotive (at 6:00 AM no less). Of course, then I wasn't supposed to bitey face with pee-wee (who we know only gets a sore leg when threatened with obedience school).

I heard Momma and Master talking about doing something fun with cousin Jack and was momentarily excited, only to find out they were going to engage in yet another non-dog friendly activity.

That's right. They abandoned me to take cousin Jack to the Jordan's IMAX to see the new batman movie. [Momma - It was great! We sat in the front row and it was super loud and lots of things blew up!]

That left me home alone (again) to babysit pee-wee and try to keep him calm. So I let him play with my monkey stuffie just to keep him from bugging me (ignore ugly walls. This is one of our under construction rooms).And I don't know if you can really tell from this photo, but he keeps humping the monkey. Ewww!After the movie they met up with Grandma and Grandpa for a late lunch which would normally at least yield leftovers for me, but due to the fact that cousin Jack is 16 years old, he snarfed up all the foodables and they came home empty handed.When will this abuse end?

Mango Man! Oh yeah!

P.S. Did I mention that I am only getting 5 cups of kibble / day now? How will I sustain myself? I am NEVER getting on the scale again!


Dozer and Coop said...

Oh Mango! We are with you in your pain. How can they go to a movie without you? We just got back from our walk and Dad was about to pass out from the heat and so were we. It was fun to go out but it got too hot and we were puffin' all the way home. Dottie got to have a short walk and then she played i the front yard in the sprinkler. Girls are such wimps!

Hang in there Mango, your brothers in pain,

Dozer and Cooper

Khyra The Siberian Husky said...

Poor Mango Man -

Are you at least getting some yummi green beans and/or peas to supplement ALL that missing kibble?

We are waiting for our walk too - this weather is just sooooo wrong!


Sami & Baylee said...

Oh Mango, I would insist you get more kibble, 5 cups how will you ever be able to maintain that handsome figure? It was very nice you to share your monkey with Dexter! That is a quality I like in a handsome dog like yourself!

Lovie Dovie Baylee

Randi said...

Awww Mango...I think your jowls have lost ARE SKINNY!!!!!!!!!!

& baby sittin PEE WEE? Whats that all about? so not fair..

Love & Licks,

Peanut said...

How are you going to survive on 5 cups of food a day? I don't think you will make it. Come down I can get figure out how to get into the closet with our food or the freezer with our meatables.

Niamh said...

Only 5 cups of food a day and being left at home to babysit while your people watch a movie and eat!! This is cruelty to animals if I ever heard it. Hope you have a better time this week.

Your friend,

Lorenza said...

HI, Mango!
Sounds like you had a very dramatic day!
No movies for you
Baby-sitting Dexter
Watching him humping your monkey
Getting ONLY 5 cups of kibble
Not fair!
Go to sleep and lets hope tomorrow will be a better day!
Kisses and hugs

Petey said...

Uh, Mango? I'd send you some spare kibble but I only get 2/3 a cup a day! So what you eat in a day, I pretty much get in a WEEK! Maybe you can swipe some of Dexter's when he's "romancing" the monkey.

On second thought, maybe you better get him a new girlfriend - what if he and the monkey have babies?!?! Half-lab, half monkey?!? Monkador Retriekeys?!?!

Your pal,


Biggie-Z said...

Oh Mango, I know how you feel. It is TOO HOT to do anything, and I have to sit around with a leash on because I'm barking too much. On top of that my stomach is being a little sensitive, with the result that I may have killed a rug in Momma and P-Daddy's bedroom. So I'm on reduced and BORING rations too. blech.


Dewey Dewster said...

Gee Mango..

Are ya on a diet??? Seems like a lotta people 'n doggies too are on one...... Guess there's just too much good food ta pass up isn't there ? Heard the Batman movie was good but any pictures we saw of the Joker have been so scary....we just haven't gone......the heat has been makin' everyone feel like they just wanta nap all day....thanks fer stoppin' by.....
Dewey Dewster here....

Kapp pack said...

Thanks for all the well wishes. I really hope this new medicine will work for me! I hate when my humans leave me home to puppy sit!

Woo woo, Kelsey Ann

MJ's doghouse said...

oh man..I just cannot believe that you suffer so many poor man. I wish i could be there to take care of you Mango. But I am here being ingnored.

Deefor said...

i feel your pain. My humans were hot so they went to the movies too. And left me hanging around the floor. I went for a short walk cause of the heat. Nice of you to share your monkey with pervert peewee.
That sounds like a tiny amount of food for someone as huge as you.


Maggie & Mitch said...

OMG, is this weather the pits, or what?! You really should have been allowed to see the movie in the aire-conditioned theatre too, Mango! Sometimes the hoomans can be so mean!

Love ya lots
Maggie and Mitch

Girl Girl Hamster said...

I'm bored too..

~ Girl girl

Mack said...

Mango -
The same exact thing happened to me yesterday too. My peeps went and saw Batman, went out to eat and then came home with no leftovers!
Why is there so much abuse in the world??

Charlie Daniels said...

Chew the scales. That should work!



River said...

No one wants to move in this heat. Makes life boring when you can't play bitey face or do zoomies. It will get better just not right away.

love & wags,

The OP Pack said...

Hey, Mango, we are friends of Khyra and her mom. We found a girl friend for you. We were at "thevet's" Saturday and there was a really sweet gal mastiff there. Too bad you can't come for a visit and maybe meet her too.

Wags, the OP Pack


Woof Mango

Geeez!!!! You're a big pup. We thought Norman was big at 80 pounds, holy puppy poop. And what's with the 5 cups of kibble a day? That's just not right.
Desert Pups here and we thought we'd drop in an introduce ourselves cause we're new in town.

Woof, woof
Scuba, Keiko, Norman and Toby from Life Inside The Fence

Deetz said...

Oh Mango I am sorry you had a boring weekend....Pee Wee is sure getting a work out on that monkey..
I gave you an award

Amber-Mae said...

How can they do that to you? I get all grossed out seeing a male dog humping a stuffie. Eeew!!!

Butt wiggles,
Solid Gold Dancer

Harry said...

Oh dear Mango, you do sound glum! I wish I could eat 5 cups of kibble though!

Toodle pip
Harry x

Asta said...

Oh Mango..
I'm so sowwy that you awe being stawved and left alone..totally wong..want me to come and comfowt you??
I have something fow you on my bloggie
smoochie kisses

Abby said...

Hi, Mango...

OMdoG...Are they starving you????

Starving you & leaving you home to baby-sit???

That's just not right...

Abby xxxooo

Eric said...

Hi Mango,Thanks for dropping by. Bad news your day was boring.Mine was too, no wheelies about to bait, or even bite, haha!!
Oh yeah, by the way the Mango shop, we have that here too. Usually sells more than 1 dress but not for dogs mores the pity.

Wags, Eric x

Georgeous said...

Oh Mango poor you, pee wee sitting. I'm definately going off the idea of a house mate from your experience.
Love 'n' slobber

Asta said...

You can nevew get wecognised too often fow youw it's OK that you got the awawd befowe, hehehe..and I think you'we vewy studly
smoochie kisses

Saint Lover said...

Hopefully you will get a reprieve from the heat. It was hot here today, but started to cool down and thunderstorms are moving in. Tomorrow it will only be 82 and 80 on Wednesday... We'll try huffing and puffing and blow it your way.

Moco said...

We totally feel for you, Mango. You are long suffering and all should know about it.

oorvi said...

Hi Mango,

This is my first visit to your blog...but "Mango - The Relentlessly Huge" caught my attention and I was drawn to your blog:)

My first job was to figure out how huge was relentlessly huge! 230 lbs translates to 104 kgs! Wowie! That's huge - and I agree...5 cups of kibble is what...? Bird-feed!

Mango, may I request you to come and help when those two put me through the bath ordeal this weekend? With you on my side, they wouldn't dare!

I'd like to invite you to my place...though it's a bit small:(

Licks n Wags,

Agatha and Archie said...

UNBELIEVABLE>>>not taking you to Batman...what do these humans think about??? We are just lying sprawled out on the kitchen floor( tiles) becasue we can not even move in this heat. We feel your food pain buddy,we are on a bit of a diet ourselves......Love A+A

Penny, Poppy & Patches said...

Poor Mango! Only 5 cups a day and NO foodables from lunch? You'll soon be wasting away to nothing and we'll have to call the animal police on your mom for abuse. BTW, we only get one cup twice a day, but then we aren't nearly as huge as you and we get LOTS of treats in between. Hang in there, big boy! That diet can't last forever!

Poppy, Penny & Patches

Kirby said...


I understand the starving thing. My parents have done it to me too. They say I get too heavy, but I disagree. Alas, they control the food, which is way unfair!

Your pal,

Joe Stains said...

omdog dude you need to get out of there. Can you hop on the bus and head to cooler weather or something??

Willow the Black Dale said...

Oh Mango, I am so sorry buddy. I live in the house with the Food Monitor. No really, seriously there is one and does live at my house. She measures, she reads about the food, The ONLY upside to all of this is well WE get fed first.
The trick is to get peewee on your side so he will give up some of his food for the "cause" and that "cause" is YOU!!!!
good luck,

Huskee Boy said...

I hope you are a good puppy-sitter, Mango! (Well you must be pretty good since you allow Dexter to get away with humping the monkey!)
Oh and did your parents reward you for doing such a good job when they came back?

Snowball said...

Poor Mango, First, you have to share your pawrents with PeeWee and now Cousin Jack is there to steal some too.

You said you are only getting 5 cups of kibbles now and may I ask how much did you get before? whats you weight, Mango? you look like a giant to me.



Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Now Sir Bubba...that was a horrible day for you Mango...left at surely could have gone to the IMAX...a hooge screen for a hooge Mango! And to go out ot eat and bring you no leftovers??? That's beyond cruel. Hey...the little bowlin' pins here are called duckpins! Funny how they have different names...they're only in really old bowlin' alleys....

That Pee Wee with his leggie...poor guy..ya didn't sit on him, did ya Mango er Bubba? Love that Bubba name...fits ya!

Now Mango...hangin' out on the deck till ya pass out from the heat IS A BAD IDEA. Ya wanna know why? Cuz...the first thing they would do is give you a bath in COLD WATER. The second thing would be to TAKE UR TEMPERATURE...and ya know where that goes.

On that note...stay cool...ya already are the coolest dog anywhere...


Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Five cups of kibble?

They're starvin' ya Man...start eating Master's legs...feeding will change.


wally said...

That's it! I'm calling the SPCA! Starving, neglected dog!

It is totes hot here so I have to take many breaks on our early morning walks, too.


ps. I have that monkey stuffy, too! Or rather, had. Now I just have his disembodied head.

Chef said...

Mango, I packed you a doggie bag filled with kibble, liver, apple and cheese. Where should I leave it?


Biggie-Z said...

Mango, sounds like with your scavenging you are already eating a modified raw diet! My friend Harry the Belgiean Tervuren (?) eats his momma's garden too. He likes english peas the best. I prefer leafy greens.

Nessa said...

Welcome to the club, Mango. I am wasting away to NOTHING.