My buddy, Max, has been bugging me for a while to come and visit him in South Africa.
He's been sending lots of photos showing off the beautiful countryside within walkie distance of his house.



So I agreed that an expedition would be just the ticket.
Sadly, the internets access is, well, spotty at best in South Africa, so I was compelled to find another way to plan the details of my trip.
Being a resourceful chap, I discovered that I could communicate with a hammie radio using Norse code.
The uber geeks that momma works with provided me with the hammie radio, but what about this Norse code crap?
Fortunately, my pals Bajas and Virus live in a place called Norway, where, if I am not mistaken, they speak actual Norse. I contacted them right away and we were ready to communicate!

He provided an alleged transcript of my conversation with Max which is not at all how I remember it.
Max: Do not bring Lacie, I repeat, DO NOT BRING LACIE!

Mango: Hey, Max, how ya doin?
Max: OK, when are you coming to South Africa?
Mango: I have shiney teeth
Mac: You're breaking up. Sounds like shark teeth?
Mango: Your buttocks are like diamonds
Max: Mango! Get the manual out. You can't have just said that.. never mind.
Mango: I am arranging transport via bathtub for my large and purple self.
Max: Huh?
Mango: I think buzzards have lips
Max: Can you put Dexter on please?
Mango: Should I bring my friends?
Max: Sure, as long as you don't bring Lacie.
Mango: When the puffles come to Vegas you are in the mood.
Max: I'm going to sign off soon
Mango: Did you say, "Bring Lacie?"
Mango: OK, I will bring Lacie, but I warn you, she is very rugged and unedited.
Max: This isn't working.
Mango: See ya soon pal! Over and out!
Mango Man! Oh yeah!
45 comments:
"BRING LACEY! SKIP A TURN, GO TO JAIL!! BRING LACEY!"
...never mind...we'll wing it!
Lots of Ticks
MAXDOG IN SOUTH AFRICA!
ps No Mangos in the trees yet
I didn't know buzzards had lips.
Lacie is going to have a ball in Africa. Have you got one of those hats for her. She'd look smashing in one.
tailwags
Noah
hahaha! this should be interesting!
Mango,
Just got your text message - yes, I use Safari, rather than Netscape or Firefox? Maybe Relentlessly Huge dogs who don't have opposable thumbs shouldn't try texting....Wait a minute, here comes another one....do I want to go on Safari? Heck yes!!! Just don't invite Lacie -she tends to cause international incidents when she leaves the country.
Your pal,
Petey
Wooos Mango Man! I hope you have fun there.. with Lacey too!
I do not think buzzards have lips, and what the heck is a puffle? In the mood for what?
This should be a very interesting trip, I think the wildlife is actually bigger than yourself!
-Kira The BeaWootiful
I am passing on SA, having sustained injury to self in wilds of Mayemphis.
Regards to all who make the trek
Gussie
Perhaps it's the translation but you don't seem so good with the Norse code.
Maybe you should try another language. Perhaps Swahili over Skype?
Over and out,
Bobo and Meja
Mango Man!! We are looking forward to your adventures (but please leave the Lacie beast at home - we shutter at the thought of those puppy pictures!)
XOXO
Lilly, Piper, Carrleigh and Java
that was a nice thing to say over on our Bloggy, Mango!
--our mum says she goes off leash only at the farm and in the woods where there is no traffic--but yes we are good at staying around and we never let our humans out of our sight.
Can you bring me some diamonds back? I love sparkly things.
toodles
Bonnie
When the puffles come to Vegas we are alway in the mood too. Careful that you don't step in any elephant poo when you go to see Max!!
Snorts-
Brutus the Frenchie
I think he said make sure woo bring KHYRA!
Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra
PeeEssWoo: I don't know how Bajas khan do it!
OMG!!! I laughed so hard I cried!!!
Mango, how come you're only taking Lacey? I thought you had a whole harem of ladies at your feet... Ok... maybe I'm doin' some wishful thinking... sigh... no south africa for me! BOL!
Mom is (uncharacteristically and temporarily, I hope or not)speechless, doubled over, as she is, spraying the contents of her mouths (and teeth) all over the screen. I can't wait for the next episode. Now I'm going to see Max to find out what was really dit-dashed.
Hugs xo
Sammie
.... . .-.. .-.. --- -- .- -. --. --- .. - ... -.. . -. -. .. ... - .... . ...- .. --.. ... .-.. .- -.. --- --. .... .- -.-- .-- --- .-- -- --- .-. ... . -.-. --- -.. . - .... .- - .. ... ... --- .-. . - .-. --- -- .- -.-- -... . -.-- --- --- ... .... ..- -.. - .-. -.-- .... .- -- .-. .- -.. .. --- -. . -.- ... - - .. -- . -- -- -- -- -- .... .- -- --- -.- -... -.-- .
(can be translated here)
EISH! EISH! I f....in...ally got my in...ern..et work.......g
The shun is sining, the sirds are binging. We r ready for you!
BON VOYAGE!!!!
You are an expert! You really know Norse code! I think Max understood everything! :)
Only you to makes us laugh, Mango!
Kisses
Rufus and Indie
Here is where I am soooo impressed.
Dennis the Vizsla can barely write in English and he knows Morse Code and it actually translated to something that made pretty good sense. Amazing!
As for you Mango, better be sure and take a huge amount of Deep Woods Off to spray those 36" diameter spiders with.
Thanks for making my day, Mango!
Kisses,
Stella
What a fun trip Mango, loved your hat in the header pic - you so look the part.
Cant wait to hear more of your adventures but you must be very careful.
We offered Petey a load of Bailey's bloomers as a precaution against nasty insect bits - do you want us to look out another pair for you?
love
Martha & Bailey xxxx
a 'loan' of as opposed to a 'load'....
Looks like secret communication is not your cup of tea, Mango... but hopefully your adventure in the wilderness will bring better luck.
Licks, hero
Now Mango...ignoring all the leave Lacie home nonsense, I'd like to hear more about Max's diamonds...and exactly where they are located.
Inquiring Lakelands wanna know....
Oh...what does it mean that I am UNEDITED?
Kisses, darling...
Laciegirlie
Mango.
"(We) believe there is no sickness of the heart too great it cannot be cured by a dose of Africa. Families must go there to learn why they belong together on this earth, adolescents to discover humility, lovers to plumb old but untried wells of passion, honeymooners to seal marriages with a shared sense of bafflement, those shopworn with life to find a tonic for futility, the aged to recognize a symmetry to twilight. (We) know this all sounds a bit much, but if (we) have ever seen magic, it has been in Africa."
~John Hemingway, African Journeys
(Told you we are of a learned sort. Or at least trying to be.)
Have a fabulous trip. We know you're not going because of sickness of heart, but the magic you'll experience (bottle it up and bring it home) will be a tonic for anything that you may need. Or at least almost anything. It sounds like you may be faced with some challenges.
We'll be anxious to hear all about your trip! Even the unedited versions.
Safe travels,
Jake and Fergi xxoo
We think Lacie may already be there amongst all that wildlife:) Virus is really pulling your let there, Mango, are you going to let a cat do THAT to you?
Woos, the OP Pack
Pee Ess, if you need help, we would love to come too.
Mango, I wish you well on your incredible journey. Please be careful and I hesitate to say it, but make sure your shots are up to date. You don't want to get any diseases while you are over there. Be careful of the water and don't eat anything that you don't recognize. Godspeed to you.
licks and sniffs, Sasha
I will come along if you think you may need herding skills, only offering because because mom said it would be polite.
your pal, morgan
Ummmm....Mango, are you SURE...you want to go to Africa???
You will be a small dog over there compared with that elephant!
Smileys!
Dory
Oh my, we can hardly wait to hear all of your adventures, specially since you invited Lacie, hehehehe!
Luv & Wirey Hugs,
Butchy, Snickers, Ruby, Sylvester & Scuby
WOW! Scooter is sooo jealous you are going on such a "venshur" Mom laughed and laughed at your norse code.....
Watch out for lions and tigers and all those preditors!
Hugs
Sunny
pee ess the hat is pawfect!!!
Dear Mango,
You are so clever, brave and wise!
Are you going by air or sea? You can go by sea without swimming by going in a boat. My Paw has a fishingboat which he would probably lend to you if you want it.
smooches,
Mr Darcy
That is great... We love it...
Keep it up Mango you will get there. Just need a better translator..
Big Sloppy Kisses
Gus, Louie and Callie
Way to go Mango - have a brillant trip!
lots of jealous woofs
Clive
Take care of my girl Lacie down there!
Awwww Mango...there aren't gonna be bugs over there, are there????
Tails tucked...
Scruffy and Stan
oh mango ...please be careful...you know how i worry about you...maybe it is a good idea to bring lacie....you might need to throw her to the lions so you can escape....have a great trip and please sweet mango...dont forget about me while you are on your safari
Lets get this party started!! woo
Sounds like a fun adventure is about to begin!!! I hope Lacie has fun. Oh and by the way, love the hat. Maybe Dennis could borrow it after your safari, since he has lost his fedora!
Oh, boy, Mango - I can already tell, this is going to be quite an adventure!
Would you mind bringing a meerkat back from Africa for Marge to chase? Not sure if they actually live in South Africa, but hey, what's a little exploring out in the savannah to go find one? ;)
Mango
Norse code is not your thing but let's try it locally. Bee doo bee ba bep. I just asked you to make me a sandwich. I hope nothing goes wrong with the flight.
norwood
Hi, Mango!
Forget about communications and go there now!
I am sure you are going to have a pawesome time with Max!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza
Mango, my mate...
While we wait, in anticipation, for your impending arrival, please can we take a moment to correct some of your readers views:
** THERE ARE NO TIGERS IN AFRICA!!!
** YOU CANNOT STEAL OUR MEERKATS! (Indeed, you will NEVER catch them!)
** THERE ARE MORE THAN ENOUGH MOSQUITO NETS FOR LACIE - UNLESS YOU WANT HER TO GET MALARIA!
** OUR DRINKING WATER IS THE BEST IN THE WORLD, BUT YOU MIGHT GIVE OUR RIVERS A MISS.
** THERE ARE MANY OTHER MANGO'S HERE...BUT PEOPL EAT THOSE KINDS!!
** OUR HOUSE AND HEARTS ARE BIG, SO ALL VISITORS ARE WELCOME!
...and remember, there are MANY animals watching your every move!
Lots of licks
MAXDOG
ps...Toffee says he has a 'warm feeling' about Lacie!
Woo Mango! That is sure a long way to travel! I hope you have fun. I hear it's pretty hot down there, so try to stay cool!
Holly
Mango and PeeWee, come by my blog to get some cookies!
xoxo
Pumpkin
I wonder how big you'll be next to that elephant? Can't wait to see your adventures!
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