So I'm minding my own business and talking to my next door neighbors through the fence and kind of getting some loving from them and all of a sudden that dumb Oliver comes all poking his face in mine and trying to get into my space.
Naturally, I had to go big dog on him and try to teach him some manners and OK, well, maybe I was a little rough, and, well, maybe I sort of let my toofer clip him and maybe there was a little blood, but was this really called for?
Before I even had a chance to explain myself, the animal cops were knocking on my front door and totally arresting me! Huh?
The Mango was most unceremoniously dumped in the slammer.
Oh look! It's my pal, Brownie!
Then I was taken into court where some pee-wee midget court appointed attorney awaited me.
The Mango is guilty of NOTHING!
The trial was quickly underway and apparently the state had been able to collect many witnesses to paint a most horrific and untrue picture of my large and I didn't mean to hurt the puppy self.
First up was the BEAST herself! I am surprised they didn't have to clear the court with all that shrieking!
Then they called Pumpkin who I must say appears to be holding some unhealthy resentments regarding our recent date.
I figured Pee-Wee would vouch for me after all I have done for him. But even he did not have any kind words.
And finally the little drama queen himself appeared. Oh, all is lost!
And the jury deliberated for like about 30 seconds before appearing with their verdict.
This court is rigged, I tell you!
And the judge slapped a restraining order on my large and ever so neglected self. Now I am not allowed to even enjoy my yard if that little yellow monster is out in it.
I insisted that we stop for a car cookie on the way back from the courthouse and none of that taking it back out of my mouth this time. You can see here the result of my argument with Momma.
Just give me the blasted thing! The Mango is most stressed out!
I decided to stage a protest when we got home. Ha! If he can't be out in the yard when I am there, then I am NOT coming in! Not even for hot dogs! Not even if it rains! That's right! See what you have done to me.
Look at him! Momma wanted to get a photo of his terrible "wound" but he would not hold still because he knows what a big faker he is.
Oh, there it is! A tiny little scratch on his precious muzzle. You might even have to bigify to see it at all.
The brat is getting special playtimes that do not include the Mango!
The funny thing is, I actually like the little guy and want to play with him, but I get confused when he picks up my toys or gets too close to momma and he won't listen to me when I warn him to back off.
Has it been five days yet?