Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Postus Interruptus


The Mango interrupts his usual compelling day to day action adventure bloggy to bring you this special post.


Oh friends, pity the poor PeeWee. He continues to receive contest entries from doggies who wish they were black labs like him but are not.

Personally, I find the whole thing rather entertaining. I think that the summer heat is getting to some of my pals. Really, for sure, right? I mean check this out...

Dear Dexter,
Here is an entry for your Black Lab Contest. His name is Dave (aka the LabraDave) and his blog address is http:/armyoffourdigest.blogspot.com. Here is a photo of him doing something you Labs love to do - play fetch. As Siberians do NOT fetch, this is proof enough that he is a Lab in a Sibe suit. For further proof, please see this post from back in May of '07: Ask the Ao4 - VI - Leashes, Love, & the LabraDave.
Thanks for your consideration.
Tail wags,
Stormy





Even I, Mango, can see that is no labradoink. Sure it is one confused floof dog to be retrieving, but where is the pointy head? Where is the (duh) black fur?


Then there is my classmate and teacher's pet suck up dog, Norwood.

He's been spending way too much with the black labradork goon squad at his day camp (where they have a convenient spy cam that momma can check out when she is on something called a "conference call" at the work place).









Can you hear them now? "We accept you, one of us! Gooble Gooble!"

Hey! Bonus points for any doggie who can place THAT movie quote. Guess they have film festivals at camp.

Idiot cracker dog actually let them stuff him into this heinous labrasuit. Don't wear that to skool or I will FREAK! I swear!










Most alarming yet (but I have no doubt that our email box is in for even more images which cannot be unseen).

Dear Dexter,

Oh I just LOVE contests! Oh boy, oh boy...

So ummm... I wanted to submit my picture for the labradog contest. You don't know me. I am definitely NOT your bloggie friend, Pearl the Pug. Ok?

Are there prizes for the winners!? No one will ever guess who I am! Wheeeeeeeeeee!

xoxxo
Pearl











In other news, PeeWee is such a dunder head that he doesn't even recognize his own kind amongst the entries for the black lab contest.

For example, he received a photo with the following touching letter;

Dear Dexter,
You don't know me...my name is um... Lexter....I am an adorable black lab and I deserve to be in this contest. BTW, do you have cell numbers for all the other contestants? I'd be glad to help you organize those or somethin'.....just send them all to my phone...
I am a really friendly black lab. Um...my favorite thing 'bout bein' a lab is swimming and chasing a um tennis ball. I do generally floss after chewing on that ball cuz ya get all those disgusting fuzzies in your mouth...Swimming is cool if you can still stand in the water....don't like deep water....
I do have a special black lab smoothie that the other contestants may enjoy....will even give a bit of a break on the price...should I figure on a gallon per dog? We Labs do get thirsty and I should know as I've been one most of my life....
Let me know what I win for first prize....I did win, right????
Kisses, Darling er um
Fond wishes,
Lexter, Black Lab
He rejected the entry. Can't imagine why. Sounds like this contest is rigged to me. Look at that sweet little labrabigbottomscreechbeast.










Mango (watching from the sidelines) man! Oh yeah!

P.S. From Momma - Dexter is overjoyed every time he receives a beautiful black lab photo for his contest. I am shielding him from the more, ahem, questionable entries and referring them directly to Mango for disposition.

53 comments:

thedivinemissmolly said...

Oh Mango Poor Dex is a confoosed Labradog but I is glad he is gettings lots of entries apart from keeping him outta your furs it is giving him happys and thats always good right ?
Is your quote from the film Freaks ?
Luvs
Molly
xx

The Thundering Herd said...

Freaks, of course.

Uh, and we Sibes are convinced and have been convinced for a long time that Dave, as cute as he is, is a labradork.

3 doxies said...

OMG...I would look fabulous as a labrADORE...course, I don't fetch, swim, suck up, or haves black hair, or long legs....must go ponder this now!
It's sooooooo good to back to da 'puter...hehehe...aren't you glad I'm back? Oh goodness, Iam sooooo full of my self.

Puddles

The Paw Relations said...

There certainly are some rather strange black labradors out there!

The Rocky Creek Scotties said...

We'll be sending over our own labradork!!

XOXO
Lilly, Piper, Carrleigh and Ruairi

Minna Krebs said...

HAHAHAHAHHAHAH!

Tell Dexter NOT to feels bad....this just proves that lots of dogs secretly wishes dey be a labradork!!

MinnaK

Mack said...

I wonder if I paint my white parts black - do you think I could pass for a LabraMess?

tula said...

uh. wait a minute.. there's labradork wannabes?? i knew about nordork. but there's others. r woo sure? what's the prize fur this labradorktastic contest? a million dollahs.

confused.
tula, the only albino labradorkette

Toffee said...

Ha! ha!
Those letters made me get up from my slumber to check out what my mom was laughing about!

Very funny!

Hope you are staying cool Mango.

xo
toffee

Jen said...

Hehe, I KNEW I should have entered Murphy the Jacka-wannabealabrador! LOL. Ah well, glad you got the Soph's entry and we did blog about balck is beautiful today. :)

Hang in there Mango, I am sure we'll be back to focusing on something other than the Labradorks soon!

Jen and the Black Dog Crew

Maggie Mae said...

Mango,
I never knew there wuz so many pups out there that wishes they wuz black labradorks...geez I has to hang out with 2 browns and a yellow all the time and that's enough for me! ;)

Woofs and Licks,
Maggie Mae

Life with 5 dogs said...

So Funny that their are so many different looking labradorks! What a fun contest!
Your Friends at
http://www.lifewith5dogs.com/

Pearl said...

Oh Mango,

This is MOST disturbing.

Somedogs really need to get a life. Although I think that Pearl Lab is a real cutie.

Just sayin'.

HoundDogMom said...

We are so glad you are reviewing these before showing them to Dexter. I am sure he would be mortified by all the different looking labradorks in the world. At least it keeps you busy and I am sure Mom just loves the overload of entries or semi-entries. The Hounddogs.

Priscilla said...

Poor Dexter! Can he really not recognize who's a labradork and who's not?
So glad you're there to help him, Mango!
It sounds like PeeWee's contest is a really big hit!!

P.S. Your post made me laugh SO MUCH!

Sue said...

We just love your mismatched contestants. Keep them coming.
Morgan, Tsar and the Porties

Samantha said...

How hilarious! (Hmmmmnnnn - maybe I could spraypaint my sisfur black, as she doesn't have much hair and send her picture in as a labradork puppy?) - Hmmmmnnn - have more thoughts. Love your weirdo wannabees!
Hugs xoxoxo
Sammie

The Army of Four said...

I don't know that Dave WANTS to be a Labrapup, he just IS one. Seriously. Unzip that Sibe suit and there's a Lab underneath!
Tail wags,
Storms

Khyra And Sometimes Her Mom said...

So THAT is why The Beast wouldn't let me borrow her BlakhkLab outfit -

She was already skhweezed into it -

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra
PeeEssWoo: Are woo sure Master Chew Sits isn't where The Mother Ship is lokhated?

Cheryl, Indiana, Shingo and Molly said...

Oh these entries are hysterical!! We hopes Indy isn't getting any ideas!!

Woofs and Kisses!
The Fiesty Three

Sam and Pippen said...

Although I am a rare miniature black (and white) lab and can out swim all the regular sized labs AND am in training for the Field Trial World Championships, I won't be sending in my picture for Dexter's competition. I wouldn't want all the other black labs to feel inferior...

Great contest though!

Sam (and Pippen)

Mimi and CC Cabana said...

Who knew labradudes and labradames would be coming out of the woodwork to participate in the contest, huh? Dog bloggers are a competitive bunch.

NORWOOD UNLEASHED said...

Get me outta of this heinous suit..These darn goons did it again! I'm beginning to pant non-stop and repeatedly say yes yes yes- more more more ball ball ball.
oh well.... I would not have wanted to see my GQ self in a MASTIFF suit..

nordork

Peppy Sheppys said...

Otis has decided he wants to be a labradude in part because black is quite slimming. He is far too lazy to chase tennis balls and far too dense to ever swim on top of the water so his best hope is that you have a Mango-look-alike contest. He is going to start gaining weight NOW in hoping to approximate the relentlessly huge as closely as possible.

Sheps w/Pep (but not w/labrapower)

Marjie said...

Mango, your brother may make fun of you for your ponderous and thoughtful existence, but it's good that you are shielding him from frightening things such as those you've posted here! Oh, yeah!

Drools,
Thor

Those Elgin Pugs said...

Hello's 'deres BigEfied Me's..
It's yous littl'Efied yous!!

What 'da L is going on's!!

Me going to have frightmares.

I's gonna see man in green and red striped sweater wits metal claws!!

Ands me's not talkin' 'bouts 'da grunge singer 'dat is 'da smells likes teen spirt in 'da sky!!

Me's totally freaked outs..
Maybe it's 'da heat??

Okay.. I's gonna goes..
protect youself too!!
oh 'da madness's!!

Yous Little yous,
Anakin Man

Molly,Taffy and Monty said...

Oh Mango

We laughed so much we fell out of our beds. This has to be the most entertaining contest of the year.

Molly, Taffy and Monty

Bouncing Bertie said...

I feel vindicated in my original objections to this contest and am delighted to see that so many of my friends are also registering their protests against your (I repeat) breedist, colourist and body-partist competition in such subtle and creative ways!
Toodle pip!
Bertie.

Penny and Patches said...

Hahahahaha! This is one contest that we could surely NOT have a chance at winning. We definitely do NOT fetch and you can forget about us bringing anything back to our peeps! If they throw it, it's ours and they are NOT getting it back! We do think the LabraDave is pretty cute! And the Nordork looks better as his normal self...just sayin'!

Aire-hugs,
Penny & Patches

Roo said...

Hilarious!!! Tempted to ask Mom to paint me black and enter under an assumed name ;)

Y'all are havin way too much fun with this,
Roo

Ms. ~K said...

Either you've got it or you don't...
You can't fake Black Lab!
Licks and sniffs,
Buddy

doyle and mollie said...

we think there is a bit of dorks in all of us...

Frankie Furter said...

OMD OMD I hope my cussin' Sarge doesn't see this contest! He'll be wantin to roll in mud and enter!
this is just toooooo funny!!!
I'm lovin' it!

Wild Dingo said...

FREAKS!

(ok, i googled it...)

anyhooo... if there IS a spot for Labrawannabees... then we will NOT submit one... yah, that's right. we refuse to join a contest that would have us as a contestant.

now where is THAT from?

Benny and Lily said...

Oh Mango,
You need to sit down and have a talk with that kid. BOL
Good luck
Benny & Lily

Eric said...

Apparantly I've been sent ovre here for therapy. Because Mango - all labradork dudes are plain scary and now I've seen LEXTER...Ahhhhhhhhh.....I'm never going to be cured...

Maggie and Mitch said...

Who knew there would be so many wannabeblacklabradorks! You really have to stay on your toes, Mango!

Love ya lots
Maggie and Mitch

houndstooth said...

Freaks!

I don't understand why the labradork would think we Greyhounds would ever want to lower ourselves to enter a Labrador contest! Surely those entries were genuine. I mean, who would want to pretend to be a Labrador? You must be laughing a lot over this, Mango!

Bunny

Koobuss said...

I have a big black spot on my back. Does that count? At least a little bit? Maybe I can be a halflab. Does that count? At least a little bit?


Love and Lots of Koobuss Kisses,
Koobie

Lola said...

So I guess this means that Franklin and I shouldn't bother to enter, right?

lotsa licks, Lola the Lab

Lorenza said...

Haaaa!
Dexter's Black Lab Contest is getting very interesting!
Hmmm.... I wonder who is going to be the judge!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

Moose said...

Wow, that is sad, everyone wants to be a black labradog but I did not hear about any mastiff wannabes! Obviously black labs are the koolest!

Stanislaw said...

Dude. I possess the black furs. I take meds from a laboratory. I am a dog/beast. Doesn't that make me a black labrabeast? I have extreme energies, a love of feasting and a muscly bum attached to a rather skinny torso. I give mom the exact same walkies eyeball looks. Trouble and I are bestest friends. I am often busy being handsome/manly/athletic/squenchy/gorgeous/snoozely/chewing-of-shoes-ish. I faux-fetch. I seriously dig water and kiddie pools. May I enter?

ocmist said...

Grammy LOVES your header, Mango, but we are afraid you are going to come down with a really bad case of Labracooties if you keep on kissing up... um... we mean... kissing Dexter on the face... er... oh! We know... you are cleaning off something cause you are such a good sibling. Right? The Country Corgis

Tee said...

We have a Dexter here that's equally confused ... something about the name Dexter... he says he'd like to join the contest too. ;)

Licks and wags

The Dog Woods Pack

Martha and Bailey said...

Well there are certainly some very creative entries, that's for sure!
Now one of our bestest friends is Alfie - he is a black lab - would that count for us!
Being a friend of a black lab......
love
Martha and Bailey xxx
ps we also both have waggy tails....like a lab!

Heather said...

Oh dear! So many wannabes. Maybe if they just shaved themselves and got some black dye then they could pass as black Labs...;)

El'bow and Hauwii said...

we gonna check if in sanne's closet isnt a lab to enter the contest :) BOL


Kissslobbers
El'bow & Hauwii

Peanut said...

Why would anyone want to be a labradork?

Asta said...

Ummm, I think it's not faiw to shield Dextew fwom any of the faboolous con testants.. I think teaching young labwadoodes to be pwe judiced is just wong!!!
so not all labwadoodes look alike..I thought that was the whole point you wewe twying to pwove
smoochie kisses fwom Asta who thinks all theh labwadoodes awe adowable

Huskee and Hershey said...

Ahhh.. poor Dexter!! He must be one confused black Lab.. heehee..
It's good that your mom is helping him do some filtering :P

Kari in WeHo said...

Hee hee those entries make me laugh!

Don't forget, we moved to http://dogisgodinreverse.com/

Sunshade said...

Too funny... that Dexcie or Lexter or whatever her name is.... Glad you didn't fall for it!

Love nibbles,
Miss Sunshade