Friday, September 24, 2010

How to Speak Bawston (and a couple of requests for help)


Tomorrow (September 25th) is the last day to enter my contest (click on my face in the sidebar for details). So get going!


AND a SPECIAL REPORT...

It is Miss Asta's birthday! Hooray! Happy birthday, Asta!
Asta and her humans have been having a rough patch of late, but I know your good wishes will cheer them all up.

Look! It is my momma with Miss Asta herself! I am so jelly that momma actually met her.




Sometimes when momma peppers my movies with her boring spoken words, alert readers will comment on her Bawston accent. Now, personally, I think that her accent is rather subtle, but I can understand how others might want to emulate all things even remotely of the world of Mango.

Subsequently, I have composed a little exercise for those of you wishing to speak proper Bawston and enlisted the assistance of momma for demonstration purposes.

I composed a script for her to read as follows;

OK, Mango, you ready? PeeWee is from Leominster, which is west of four ninety five; even further than Worcester. You need a car to get there, but don't worry, there's plenty of parking.
If you fancy fish, you should go to Boston. There's plenty of cod in the harbor. Hey Mango! Have you seen the new Ben Affleck movie? I hear the accents are wicked pisser good. They ought to be. That Affleck dude is from around here, you know? Even if he didn't go to Harvard.


Here is the demonstration movie.



Did you listen carefully? The secret to speaking Bawston is not to open your mouth and go AHHHH whenever you encounter the letter "R" but rather to kind of swallow your "R"'s along with randomly dropping out other letters. In order to facilitate your learnings, I present a phoenetic rendering of the same speech.

OK, Mango, ya ready? PeeWee is frum Leminstah, which is west of faw ninety fiyev; even futhah than Wostuh. Yew need a cah to get theyuh, but done worry, theyah's plenny of pahkin. If ya fancy fish, yew shud go ta Bawston. Theyah's plenny of cahd in thah hahbuh. Hey Mango! Have yew seen thah new Ben Affleck movie? I heah thah accents ah wicked pissah gud. They otta be. That Affleck dude is frum ahround heah, ya know? Even if he dinnit go ta Hahvud.

Now go and practice. Feel free to post your attempts. It should be most entertaining. If you want to do a demonstration movie of how YOUR humans speak, momma says she would be game for trying her hand (?) at emulating different accents. Just be sure and include the script.

I have two important items which require assistance from my pals in blog land.

Item #1

Some readers will recall my little nephew, Oliver, who came to visit me when he was just a wee pup and subsequently slapped a most undignified restraining order on my large and not meaning to hurt a puppy self after an unfortunate encounter with my jaws of doom (you can read about that incident here).




Well now he is all grown up and tutored and everything, but he has a problem. He is ITCHY!




That's right. All the time itchy. Itchy, itchy, itchy ever since he was a teenager. His mom and dad have given him roids and tried a few dietary things, but he continues to be so itchy that he gets owies and whatnot and they are very worried about him. I don't wish the little guy any ill will and would certainly like to see him get better. His worries don't seem to be seasonal and even though he lives in a constantly under constructions house like mine, his itchies don't come and go with the different projects. So, being the kind Uncle that I am, I thought I would ask my pals what they think.


Item #2

A Burned Yeast Mountain dog has gone missing right here in Master Chew Sits and I want to put the word out to alert readers in the vicinity.

A recently neutered BARC dog went through the window at his new home of 9
days (Stowe Road, Harvard) at 9:30 this morning. We think he was
sighted in the vicinity of Taylor Road and Adams Road (Bolton?) around 1 PM
and then around 2-3 PM at 218 Liberty Square Road, Boxborough.


The distraught owner is Cindy. Her cell # is 978-501-4964

So please keep your eyes open because a Burned Yeast Mountain dog is hard to miss, but there are lots of woods and stuff out there in the wild lands of Harvard and Bolton. If you aren't from around here, just cross your paws that he finds his way back home.

Mango Man! Oh yeah!

43 comments:

Ludo van Doggy said...

BOL! You know Mango Mum keeps on meaning to record the Cumbrian accent, cos she thinks you lot over the pee would likes it.
She not sound like it though.
We like your Mom's accent!
~lickies, Ludo

Gus said...

is that "hahvad?"

We will keep our eyes open, but doubt the Burned Yeast dog will get this fah.

thank you
gussie n teka

jen said...

We will keep our eyes open!

Hey Mango we entered Leroy in your contest today, stop by and check it if you have time.
http://newfies1.blogspot.com/

NORWOOD UNLEASHED said...

Mango and momma
Ahem.. I don't think momma has a thick boston accent but her reading was funny. She should've tried out as a movie extra for ben's flick..hmm maybe momma should do a reading -speaking wisconsin hey? where's da bublar.. maybe we will and torture your momma with reading it.
norwood

Markun taideblogi said...

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The Rocky Creek Scotties said...

We're sure your nephew's family have tried giving him olive oil on his food - that works well for us.

You should hear our Mom trying to speak Bostonease with her Southern drawl - too funny!! It even makes her laugh.

XOXO
Lilly, Piper, Carrleigh and Ruairi

Tank said...

Being as your mum is no spring chicken, I'm wondering how many "R's" she has swallowed in her life... and what does this do to her innards? Is there a big ball of "R's" all knotted up in her belly that has to be suctioned out periodically?

Corbin said...

Hm, I'm not going to comment about anything Boston... I don't want to hurt my chances in the Mangotastic contest! My momma loves that city, just not their baseball team!
-Corbin

Niamh said...

Your momma has a great accent. We wish Barbara could sound like that. Even after 25 years in the south she still has a Long Island accent. Ugh!

Ambrose is an itchy guy too. I, being practically perfect, am not itchy but we have gone around the block trying to help Ambrose. I think it is because he is full of cooties. The best thing that has worked for him is a grain free diet. Over time it has made him less itchy. This summer has not been nearly so bad for him the way last summer was when he ripped his head and ears up from itching and had hot spots all over. He also gets lots of baths with special shampoo and and a leave in conditioner. Hope the little labradork feels better.

Your friend,
Niamh

3 doxies said...

I dunno what was funnier...your mom talkin' or hers laughing.
I thinks da south stole da R's from Bawston...we's always sayin' "yonder" and "yer"...course, all our words run together.

Puddles...over yonder

AFSS said...

Our paaaaaaaaaws are crossed that the Burned Yeast Mountain Dog is reunited with his owner soon.

We has Southern accents around here. We shall have Mommy try her hand (er mouth) at Boston.

Oh for the itches has your cousin been checked by a vet for ringworm or mange?

Two Pitties in the City said...

Has itchy Oliver tried switching his diet? Miss M had some problems in the beginning and they thought she might be allergic to chicken. I know the food people could explain it better, but it's something we looked into. I do hope they find that lost dog.

Pearl said...

Oh Mango, I love your momma's accent! We have COUNTRY accents around here! Yeehaw!

Ok, I am very worried about Oliver. You know I have struggled with itchies for my whole life. They have never responded at all to dietary changes, but I have had great success with steroids. I wonder what the heck is going on with sweet Oliver?

I know some people who have had great success with an herbal supplement called Skin Eze. Have your momma google it- you can buy it online.

I have found this to be very helpful on my sore spots:
http://www.onlynaturalpet.com/products/Only-Natural-Pet-Herbal-Ointment/999126.aspx

AND... I have heard that adding a fish oil to the food is very helpful. I have used this one and enjoyed it!
http://www.onlynaturalpet.com/products/Only-Natural-Pet-Pure-Salmon-Oil/999060.aspx

Sorry about the long comment. I sure hope they find a fix for Oliver!

xoxox
Pearl

The Thuglets said...

Mango we hope you get all the help you need with your post!

Not much use to are we? LOL

Have a good weekend. Will you be relaxing, paws up in the purple cave?

Big Nose Pokes
The Thugletsx

Frankie Furter said...

About the itchy thingy. A VET (shiver) once told my mom about this one... add 1 tsp. of Crisco Salad oil to the food every day.. Does NOT matter if they eat wet or dry. I'm thinkin the comment about OLIVE oil would work pretty well too.

♥♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥♥ said...

We love that Boston accent - our humans are from the other side of 495 - they were from Western Mass. so no obvious accent unless you want to count the Springfield "Hungry Hill" Irish one.

We wonder if Oliver has had his thyroid checked. We have a neighbor lab boy who had a terrible time with lots of skin problems. Once he went on meds for his thyroid, his skin improved tremendously. Just a thought. And if they get the thyroid checked, make sure the vet does the more thorough test and not the quickie.

Woos ~ Phantom, Thunder, and Ciara

Kari in WeHo said...

I sure hope Oliver's itchies go away soon


Kari
http://dogisgodinreverse.com/

The Boston Lady said...

Given that I live with two Bostonians, I will not pass judgement on Momma's accent. Going to see Ben's movie tonite, as a matter of fact and will compare speech patterns.

Before we went to the black and white side, we had a yellow lab just like Oliver. He was an itchy guy too. We fed him lamb and rice kibble and would supplement with canned version of same to add some oil to his diet. He never totally lost the itch, but we found this helped. Also I have heard garlic added to the food helps.

Khyra And Sometimes Her Mom said...

Blogger is SOOOOOOOOOO gonna get it -

Furst of all, it has the fancy new editor thingie -

AND then I got the magikh 503 error - which sometimes still shows my post but not this freakin' time -

Let's see how well my FT brain rekhalls what she pawed

SO, was that a preview into the next khontest?

Khan your DOH speak like Mango's DOH?

When we were on our Rocky search that Friday night/Saturday morning, Mom handed a flier to a woman that had stopped as she drove by - Mom explained we had khome from York PA - and in her best NJ akhcent said 'I could tell you weren't from around here'

Paws khrossed fur the Burned Yeast Mountain khanine - another newly rehomed pup on walkabout -

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra
PeeEssWoo: My DOH will paw something now - I'll try to make her stop laughing at your DOH trying not to laugh!

Khyra And Sometimes Her Mom said...

About Oliver -

I've seen some great suggestions here -

So many things it could be - and couldn't be -

Khyra's Malamute BF Summiii's Sibe Sister Kiana had regular itchy nosed episodes that they thought were just allergies but this year she rubbed herself to a new low - or is that high - in raw -

They had her tested in hopes of getting to the bottom of it all -

She tested positive for Dermodectic Mange - with one of the original possibilities maybe being Lupus -

They needed to attempt to determine why her immune system was allowing itself to be compromised - more testing was done -

She had a very low thyroid level: 0.2 with 1.0 being low normal - this probably was a contributing factor -

She is now receiving treatment of Ivermectin - she's early in the regime so it is too soon to tell how well she's responding -

I also know some dogs really have issues with corn and grains -

Perhaps testing for food allergies would be another route -

Once again, opening up the concerns to a captive group with LOTS of information to share is a bonus!

GOOD LUCK TO ALL!

Khyra's DOH

Marjie said...

Hey, Mango, your momma sounds perfectly normal to us. That could be just because our Master's family comes from Master Chew Sits and we know about Woostah and whatnot. I hope those Southerners can understand your Momma, because they talk like they have a mouth full of marbles!

As for Oliver, Momma takes Vitamin E for dry skin. That might be Oliver's problem, but you might want to click over to our bloggy and follow the link to Chan Knits, then go off to her doggies' blog, because her Sissy has awful problems caused by food allergies. I don't think foodable time in their house is so much fun. But maybe she knows something that might help.

And if you can't find the link, have Mango Momma pee mail my momma, and she'll give you Chan's informations!

Meanwhile, stay out of the hahbah. We Mastiffs don't like wawtah, and we don't much care for cahd.

Drools,
Thor

Those Elgin Pugs said...

Hey 'deres Twinner!!

Me's wished Asta a happy ones!!

Okays... 'da Mommy is so making Daddy take hers to 'dat new flick... and we's loves 'da accent!!! Yous Momma's got it down well!!

Momma had to do a southern accent in a play a couples years ago and alls 'dats ya'lls ands he haws mades me Mommys head explox'd..
hu hu's

She jokes... grandpaws from
missississississipppi

Yous Twinner,
Anakin Man

houndstooth said...

If I see a Burned Yeast dog, first I'm going to pour some water on it, but I doubt I'll see him anyway.

We were laughing at the video of your mom reading the script because everyone in Dad's family teases Grandpaw about being from New Joysey. He refuses to say the word "hog" ever in front of any of us!

Bunny

Oskar said...

Mango momma sounds funny, we like it though.

My people have never had a dog with itchies, but could it be his nerves? Maybe he is still having nightmares about the not meaning to hurt a puppy jaws of doom!

We hope the yeast doggie comes home soon.

Nubbin wiggles,
Oskar

Peppy Sheppys said...

Hallo Mango! We hope the Burned Yeast Dog does not go too far north or Sophie Brador might try to eat him.

Otis had terrible skins and doing a raw diet with NO grains and with coconut oil has helped him a lot. We hope Mr. Oliver gets to the bottom of his problem.

Sheps w/Pep

dewdana said...

I don't think DOH has much of a accent at all but that is relative I suppose! I remember the fiyah fightahs that came to your old barn on the news clip... that was an accent!
Sorry 'bout Oliver :-( So common in labbies! You said that they tried lots of dietary things already and since you already know about raw feeding maybe you suggested it but I have read lots of stories of raw diets curing the itchies! If they do not want to go that far, have they tried grain free kibble? This did wonders for our labrapal Darwin who got itchies really bad around the time he was 2yo and just could not get rid of them over more than a year. This is often one of the first dietary things that is tried for itchie relief so they probably have tried that. I know there are lots of doggies out there that are itchie relief experts who will have good solutions but if it were me I would start with raw and if that does not work then try the other stuff. Often times the other options mean a lifetime of supplements or treatments and although raw is not easy or cheap, if it works I believe that in the end it would be cheaper than the alternatives and have other benefits... Just my 2 cents though. I really feel so lucky that Moose is a totally un-itchy lab! I can't claim credit for that, he came to me that way and was eating alpo or some such kibbles. He just did not get itchy genes I guess.
I will watch for a southbound Burned yeast Mtn dog but hope she finds her way home before she gets this far!

Jed and Abby in MerryLand said...

Dear Mango & Dexter:

About Oliver's itchies: Jed [part Golden Retriever] had terrible itchies. He would chew sore spots on his back & side that got infected; he would then have to be shaved around the infection and go on antibiotics. This got to be almost a bi-weekly thing. His itchies were also year-round, although slightly milder in winter. He also has a thyroid condition, but treating the thyroid did not solve all the itchies. We did allergy testing; his major allergies were grasses, pollens, mold, etc. He had no food allergies. He has been on weekly allegy shots for over a year and has been totally cured of his itchies. Of course, he is also on tyroid meds with annual rechecks for his T4 level. Abby was also tested due to different symptoms: she has food allergies [including dairy] and some pollen/mold allergies. She gets an allergy shot every other week, along with an allergen-free diet. A Tbsp of olive oil mixed in with food won't hurt, assuming no medical contra-indications like chronic pancreatitis [which Abby has], and it will help with dry skin. We assume Oliver has been to the vet and they have already ruled out mange, fleas, simple dry skin, etc. The allergy testing and shots are a bit expensive, but the results have been worth it. Jed was miserable all the time, and now he's fine.

Mango Momma's accent is such an auditory treat because it is so rare in our mama's experience. Our mama has a real Southern accent [she is not a MerryLand native]; we're Southern-born, too, so maybe we bark with a Southern accent?

'Bye now, y'all -

Jed and Abby in MerryLand

Jazzi said...

Hey Mango
I think your Mom has a great accent. It sounds really cool. Mine could never do it that good.

wags
Jazzi

Baby Rocket Dog and Hootie said...

What a great Boston accent your mama has! We wish we had this tutorial several years ago for our daddy. Our mom is familiar with it, but the first time our Arizona raised daddy heard the Boston accent he was confused. He needed a translator for "Rabbit"=Robert and "Lawd"=Lord. Still a joke in our house!! bol.

We're sending good Aire & WelshieZen to your little itchy cousin. Also sure hope the Mountain dog gets found soon. Keep us posted. Thanks for the alert.
Smooches,
BabyRD and Hootie

Maggie and Mitch said...

We love your mom's Boston accent, Mango. It's very much like our Rhode Island cousins' accent!
Our paws are crossed that the Burned Yeast Mountain dog finds his way home to his hoomans!
Poor Oliver! We wish we had advice to give on itchies but we don't.

Love ya lots
Maggie and Mitch

Maggie Mae said...

Mango,

We luvs your mom's accent. My mom used to lives south of Boston so she has lots of furiends who sound likes dat! Happy Weekend!

Woofs and Licks,
Maggie Mae

Minna Krebs said...

Mango Man!
I just submitted my contest entry....just in da nick of time before da deadlion, I hopes

and tell your mom that we loves listening to her accent! We don't hear anyone talk like that much around here.

MinnaK

The Army of Four said...

I was hoping that when your mom started chuckling on that video and said, "Hey Mango" that she'd reach out and give you ear rubbie-dubbies or a hug or something. Other than that, it was very educational. I'm from Texas so that Boston stuff is new to me!
Woo.
Luv,
Dave

Samantha said...

ROFL! That was hilarious - some of my relatives on Dad's side are from Boston and speak with that Bostonian/Kennedy accent - love the movie today (with both scripts no less - a long work!) I like to speak with a southern accent, even if I don't have one - oh well. If wishes were horses.... We hope the Bernese Mt. Dog has been found by now - paws and fingers crossed.
xoxoxoxo
Sammie's and Avalon's Mom

chicamom85 said...

I do remember Oliver and how upset you were when he came to visit, counting down the days. I feel bad for him. I, Sasha also get very itchy skin and have for a long time. The vetlady told Mommy to give me benedryl and it does help for a while and I have a special bath soap that Mommy has to leave on me for 10 minutes before rinsing. I hate baths so you can imagine how Mommy feels about this. The vetlady also suggested getting a blood test drawn for allergies, but it is very expensive and so far Mommy is trying other things. Good luck to Oliver. We will pray that the lost doggy finds his way home. I am glad that you and Dexter are safe purple cave and all.

licks and sniffs Sasha

Asta said...

Mango

Thank you fow that wicked cool Biwfday post and gweeting fow me..I loved youw mom and wish you would have come too. Mommi and I love the way you Tawk in boston..We have an accent, but we don't heaw it, so I don't know if it's wowf posting about.

I sometimes itch too, so youw nephew might twy this stuff that was wecommended to me!

I hope that Buwn ease doggie was found safe and sound
smoochie kisses
ASTA

http://www.drugs.com/vet/dermacool-hc-spray.html

Puglette said...

hi mango! i like your momma's accent. it's cool! do you say bahk bahk? all of the pups in our house had the itchies but the worst is honey puppy. she gets to chewing all the fur off her hind end. this is not a very attractive look for the old gal. we switched to iams brand dog food. we give them all the lamb and rice variety for sensitive tummies. it is in a red bag. this has really helped all the dogs. their coats are nice and soft and plush. we get nice comments from friends at the dog park about their nice furs. i really wish little oliver's folks get this figured out. it is distressing to all involved!
hugs,
puglette
:o)

Roscoe said...

Mango,
My mamma has furiends in Bawston too! mamma always waughs at Lisa and tells her there is an R in da aphabet, learn to say it, den dey laugh!!
I has itchies too, its not a seasonal fing wif me eeefer but my vet person has me on benadryl pills...mamma says dats what dey are called. I hafa take 6 in mornin and 6 in nite. It helps, i has no more itchies and no more owies from scratching!
Hope dis helps!
giant wet kisses,
Roscoe

1000 Goldens said...

You are so funny, I loved the lesson! We saw the Ben Affleck movie last weekend and it was really good. Sometimes we had to concentrate real hard to understand. It's a great accent :)

Mollie Jo, Bobo and Uncle Puppy said...

BOL We love your momma's talkin'. We would love to hear how your momma says Peabody.


Mollie and Bobo

Black Labs and Lilly said...

Hey Mango and Dexter!

My BFF and Cousin Churchill has bad itchy skin that isn't caused by allergies, its just the way he is. Getting special oatmeal baths every few weeks really seems to help him out, you can get these done at the salon, or just buy the special shampoo and do it at home.

Hope this helps!

Mr. Magoo

Honey the Great Dane said...

Hi Mango - just catching up with your posts again!

Hsin-Yi is completely tone-deaf to accents - seriously, she thinks everyone sounds like everyone else (I think it's coz her own accent is so messed up) - well, except for Sean Connery who she thinks has the most gorgeous Scottish accent - so she never thought your Momma spoke funny at all.

About your 'little' nephew - well, you can probably guess this but I would suggest trying the Raw Diet as I know lots of doggies who are itchy like this and they can never find the reason but everything clears up when they change to the raw diet.

OK - am off to see your competition now!

Slobbers,
Honey the Great Dane

Wild Dingo said...

oh my DAWG... how did i miss this post being that I have both a Bawston accent AND a New Yoawk accent which always make people go "huh?"

as for Oliver... what a coincidence. Loki is itchy to no end right now. it's really sad to see. he's on the 'roids now but what i plan to do is seriously go back to adding fish oil (lots of it) in the diet and give him baths more often which seem to help wash the allergens off the skin. also my friend Popeye's mom from Walkin The Bark blog has much experience with this and gives her dogs Tavist or generic name: clemastine over the counter antihistamine. i will try that too if it comes back. it takes up to 3 weeks for fish oil to start having effect on doggies. so if he hasn't tried it, he needs to be patient.

also as you know, i'm a fan of RAW. Does Oliver eat Raw?

hope he feels better dude.