Thursday, October 7, 2010

Thanks (for nothing) Tank!



Imagine my delight to find a package for ME in my post office box yesterday morning. Whatever could it be? Well, I will tell you what it was...

Some time ago, my good friends Maggie and Mitch had a contest and the prize was a (gasp) hand made by their mom purple purse! And momma FORCED me to enter. I was certainly relieved when I didn't win, but then, oh the horror, inside the box was none other than said purse with a note saying simply, "Surprise! Tank!"

That's right, Tank won the ever unmanly purse and had it sent to ME!

ME!

The definition of manliness!

The anti purple wishing my dog cave were brown again mastiff!

Behold! The purple purse!





Momma wanted to show it to PeeWee and when I saw it start to disappear into his pointy little mouth I was so relieved knowing that he would likely swallow it whole!




But momma pulled it away, "Oh no! Pea! Don't eat Mango's lovely purse!"

Then, oh, I was forced to model the foo foo satchel.

Well, under protest for sure and there was not one photo of me with the blasted thing that I did not have my lipstick prominently on display. In your face Tank! I don't care if you are wearing a cone and hopping around on three leggies and taking drugs, this is war! Don't think I won't come and open a can of whup ass on your little tripod self. Yuh!











Lucky for me, momma said, "Oh Mango! That is the perfect size to transport the candy for the uber geeks at work along with my cell phone and cracker berry. Do you mind if I borrow it?"




Hey! Have at it dotty old purple Barbie dream house loving witch. At least somebody is happy. I just hope she doesn't make me wear it to skool.

Apropos of nothing, here is a movie to show you the mayhem up with with I put. Sheesh.

Mango Man! Oh yeah!

P.S. Momma armed herself with an industrial sized bottle of Dayquil and returned to the work place to spread her cooties and test the immune systems of her co-workers. Have mercy.

58 comments:

Bouncing Bertie said...

Oh Mango
Gail (through tears of laughter) keeps telling me that a REAL MAN DOG would be so secure in his masculinity that he would not feel threatened by something as trivial as being made to wear a purple handbag.
Me, I am not so sure...
Toodle pip!
Bertie.

Bouncing Bertie said...

PS Perhaps you could bring the purse with you on the field trip and use it to carry rocks.
No I am sure no-one would laugh at you.
BBB.

3 doxies said...

OMG....he didn't! Bwhahahahahahaha!
Dis is GREAT! I so know what you were talkin' bout now, the whole enemy of an enemy being a furiend.

Dat purse will be just da right size fur beer and Cheeto's.

A tripod...bwhahahahahaha!

Puddles

Maggie and Mitch said...

The purple purse is striking with your coloring, Mango!
UH OH - we think Tank is in deep doodoo! We've seen you in action before!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Lola said...

Uh....maybe it's not a purse at all. Maybe it's a European man bag. A purple European man bag. Yeah..that's what it probably is.

lotsa licks, Lola

Roo said...

Only REAL dawgs can wear purple ;)

Thinkin you be stylin Mango Man!

BOL!

Waggin at ya,
Roo

Niamh said...

We don't think purple is your color Mango. We think your momma, along with her other ailments, now has some sort of Purple Haze cooties. It is affecting her vision and she thinks everything should be purple. Watch out for purple dog dishes, a purple leash and collar. What if she redecorates your mastiff mobile in purple? Who knows, purple foodables may be next.

Your friends,
Niamh & Ambrose

Ludo van Doggy said...

I know a doggy who's efurrything is purple! It his colour, but he doesn't have a girly bag. Do you know that even has a flower on it??
~lickies, Ludo

Kari in WeHo said...

It sure is a beautiful purple purse!

Kari
http://dogisgodinreverse.com

Khyra And Sometimes Her Mom said...

How furry special!

That Tank is sooooo furry thoughtful and sooooo smart to have known your address ;-)

I know Mango Momma will let woo borrow it fur those SPECIAL times -

Of khourse, The Beastie might snag it as her own when she moves in -

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra
PeeEssWoo: We were glad to see The DOH dragged her battered body bakhk to the workies place!

Gus said...

Woot...tell the Mango Mama that Dayquil will probably get her busted if they drug test at her work.

And ya know, when this purple thing started, we theought: "Well, if anydog can pull this one off, it is the Mango Man!"

Now we are not so sure.

kisses
gussie n teka

Jen said...

I personally think the purple looks great on you! Spike however is not so sure; I think it's the male solidarity thing. I think you should try wearing it to skool and see what happens! :)

Jen and the black dog crew

Maggie Mae said...

Mango,

My mom has been on da Sudafeds all week so she know what MangoMomma is going through. RooRoo is right, only "real dawgs" can wears da purple and you is one of dems!

Woofs and Licks,
Maggie Mae

The Paw Relations said...

What a perfectly purple prussy purse Manog. Forgive us a cruel chuckle

Hound Girl said...

BOL - poor Mango and there ar enow pictures with you and the purple purse!!

Its very pretty though :)

That Tank is too silly!

The Teacher's Pets said...

Tank is really a stinker to send that purple purse to you, isn't he? I think you should send it back to him after you finish slobbering all over it, don't you think that would be a great idea?

Mack said...

We think you look lovely in purple Mango!

Levi Mac said...

BOL!!! I have been rolling around since reading this. It's just like when my mom put the pink tie on me! Roo- you said pink was my color too, I thinks you is just trying to make us feel betters but I am wif you Mango- no girly stuffs!!
How can you get him back...????

Frankie Furter said...

I am glad that your momma is able to get back to work.
Now that purse thingy has BAD written all over it.
Perhaps some unfortunate purse snatcher will take it off your paws.

Sam and Pippen said...

Mango,

You can't be too hard on Tank... he's all hepped up on meds. His whole world is purple... and male mastiffs are carrying purses! We're sure Tank was being totally thoughtful and thought (in his hepped up state) that you'd appreciate the girly purse to match your girly room!

Sam and Pippen

PeeS. You should take it to skool, cuz Norwood would be totally jelly!

Mollie Jo and Bobo said...

BOL BOL BOL Mango your manhood has sure been tested the past few weeks. BOL BOL BOL A purple purse...OH MY DOG! Those drugs Tank is on must really be making him all cracker doggie.

BOL BOL BOL


Wags and Licks,
Mollie JO & Bobo

Tank said...

Tripod, hah! I don't fear your wrath Mango. You won't admit it, but this purple phase has brought out your feminine side... in fact, I wouldn't be surprised if you secretly LOVE the purple dog cave. Maybe it was even YOUR idea. So now you have a sweet, pretty, girly room... and a lovely purple purse to match. BOL BOL BOL BOL BOL

Mango Man! The Metrosexual Mastiff, Oh Yeah!

CreekHiker / HollysFolly said...

Mango, I think purple is most manly!

Glad mom is on the mend!

Tom, Tama-Chan, Sei-Chan and Bibi-Chan said...

An this guy is your friend, Mango???????

♥♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥♥ said...

For a while there, we thought maybe the infamous purse was going to become a traveling bag and get sent from blogger to blogger. But it seems to suit the Momma well. Hope her germs get better soon. We have three little grandbipeds here ALL with ear infections - better them than us.

Woos ~ Phantom, Thunder, and Ciara

jen said...

BOL!!!
Mango man when are you going to come to grips! Purple is so your color dude!!!
I am going to have that picture of you wearing the purple purse blown up into poster and hang it on my ceiling so I can go to sleep every night with a smile on my face:)

Raymond and Busby said...

Okay, we don't know much about dogs, but we have to wonder what it is about the purple purse that makes you, um, excited?

Also, if Dexter's nickname is Pee Wee then shouldn't the shortened version of that be Pee and NOT Pea? Maybe you should call him "number one"?

Tank is in big trouble...

rottrover said...

After watching your movie we see how much your momma needs you to protect her from the PeeWee. Way to run interference.

Corbin said...

Oh, Mango! With your lipstick out like that, it looks like you're LOVING the purple purse! Just call it a satchel, Indiana Jones has one! HAHAHA. I can't wait to hear how you plan on getting Tank back!
-Corbin

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Oh for Petey's Sake...why didn't I win that purse? It's so me...

Scruffy sez to tell your momma that the bill comes to

$7453.73 with tax....

You better see our blog...

I'm a tad worried...

Love, Beastie

The Army of Four said...

It's such a BEAUTIFUL pur... umm... man-bag though! I think you could pull off using it, since you're sooooo very masculine - but it was mighty nice of you to let your mom borrow it.
Love,
Ammy
PS: I linked to you in today's post. You gave the BEST hint on my Wordless Wednesday post! :)

Marjie said...

When I was a child, there was a car rental commercial with a human Mastiff football named Rosy Grier. I didn't quite know why such a large man had a weenie name like Rosy. But imagine my horror when he carried a purse! My father said Manly Men like Rosy could have wimpy names and carry purses, even if normal men would be inviting whoop-ass all over themselves. Must be Tank was complimenting you. And since your Momma relieved you of the ghastly purple purse, it's all good! Or so Thor tells me.

No Drools,
Thor Momma

road-dog-tales said...

Mango - If that purse wasn't all purply and girly, it would make a nice treat satchel for you! Maybe you could request one in, oh, say, a dirt brown color?
The Road Dogs

Fiona, as typed by Dr. Liz said...

HAHAHAHAHA!!! Tank may be a tripod at the moment, but he clearly hasn't lost his faculties! (And even though I'm the 'anti-Mango', I still don't like purple...) *snicker*

*kissey face*
-Fiona and Abby the Hippobottomus

Priscilla said...

Dear Mango,

That is the most un-manliest bag I've ever seen but I have to say that it looks rather cute on you, or rather, you look very cute with it on!

doyle and mollie said...

war indeed but jeez you gotta laugh, im sure maggie and mitch are most relieved your momma pinched your man bag loves and licks and way to go tank!
tank:1 mango:0

LetMeTellYouATale said...

Awesome post and pics :)

C.l.o.v.e.r. said...

Hey Mango! OMD that purple purse is so lovely! Why didn't you want to wear it?! I also love the treats your mom stuffed in there. Rather, my mom loves those treats...
xo

brooke said...

HAHAHAHAHA oh Mango. the things you put up with! But could you next time could you position the purse so its blocking your lipstick. Even with warning of the lipstick, Im always shocked to see it! hehehe

houndstooth said...

BOL! Oh, Mango, at least you don't carry your lipstick in your purse! Oh, I am glad my name is not Tank! This war will be a long battle, I fear.

Bunny

HoundDogMom said...

Oh Mango, you look so manly with your purple purse. We think it would make a great kibble carrier for your treats at skool. You would be the talk of skool for sure. The Hounddogs

Wild Dingo said...

Oh my, that purse rocks Mango. I have no idea what you're complaining about. put on a black turtle neck and some black boots with that lipstick and you'll totally be metrosexual.

Gus, Louie and Callie said...

That Tank sure is a trickster. You will need to send him a pink tutu we think.... Watch him model that!!!

Big Sloppy Kisses
Gus, Louie and Callie

mayziegal said...

Awwww...don't be too hard on Tank. You know, he's pretty loopy on d-r-u-g-s and I'm sure he meant well. He was prolly having some sort of syko-dellik trip and thought, "WHOA, DUDE! THE RELENTLESS HOOOOGE WOULD PROLLY LOOOOOVE THIS!" And then he prolly hobbled all the way down to the post office on his three good legs just to mail it off to you cuz he thinks you're so swell.

Yep, I bet that's exactly what happened.

Wiggles & Wags,
mayzie

Clive said...

Oh Mango

You made us laugh so much!

It's a lovely purple purse really!! Lucky your Mom will get lots of use for it.

take care
Clive and Murray

Oskar said...

Mango I could have gone all year without another "lipstick" shot from you!

Glad you got the pretty purse, though.

Nubbin wiggles,
Oskar

Zona said...

BOL!!! BOL!! That Tank... hehehe...

Wags,
Zona

Sally Ann said...

Wow, I think you should let your Mommy borrow it. You can call it a "man sack." Please don't be to mean to poor Tank. I think he might be tougher than he looks.
Sally Ann

Lorenza said...

Mango!
I guess I will be back later because I can't stop laughing about your post!
Sorry...
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

Jed and Abby in MerryLand said...

We love the kitchen movie full of affections. And a nice kiss on the nogin for RH. We think Tank has just supplied your Christmas present for your Mango Momma; you just gave it to her early. Now what are you going to send for Tank to give his mama?

Jed & Abby in MerryLand

Samantha said...

OMG! Wiping off the puter screen we're laughing and barking so offensively loudly! Tank, you scoundrel! How could you? Mango... we feel badly for you, but hope your Momma takes it to work with her, thus removing it forever from your cave. (but we hope that your Ma IS feeling a bit better).
Hugs xoxoxo
Sammie and Avalon
PS We love the movie ...

Dennis the Vizsla said...

Purple is very manly. Just look at Prince.

MJ's doghouse said...

oh mango...dont you knwo that it is not a purple purse...it is a murse...and i realize your mom could use it..or...you could use it to put your edibles in...qwuiet a few cookies and treats could fit...and when a cutie lady dog walks buy you can give her some cookies...i can never resist a man with cookies....but..i couldnt relsist you with nothing...i even mentioned you in my blog today

tula said...

Phew.. proof. woo guys are still alive! hey mango the lipstick is kept IN the satchel.. hope woo sport it at a last days of grad skool.

TM

Sue said...

Watch out or she'll get you a purple harness and collar to wear in public. Ha ha
Morgan, Tsar and the Porties

ocmist said...

Snort, snort, snicker, snort... That Tank IS a bit nervy isn't he?! You, our dear RH, just have to walk around with that look that Sasha demonstrated so well, and no one would DARE look sideways at you. If your Mom wants to borrow it, at least it's off of YOUR neck! Glad to hear that she's able to be UP at least. The CCC

Lacy said...

w00fs, me thinks your purse iz cool..and mama says she dont blame ur mama fur taking it...its bute ti ful and her favorite color..

b safe,
~roccky

chicamom85 said...

Mango, the purse is actually lovely, well for your Mommy that is. Honestly it didn't look half bad on you. My inner Mango however says BOL BOL, take it off now! I hope you won't take this from Tank lying down. There must be revenge for this unjustice.

licks and sniff, Sasha