What are they? Should one strive to be one? It sets a mind to wondering.
While there are many nicknames that I have had to learn in regards to my labraself, none is so confounding as the moniker of "lert."
For once, the Internet has let me down. A quick google search yielded dismal results as in
LERT = Leicester Environmental Road Tolling Scheme or
And yet a similarly dreamy, half awake state does not garner analogous exclamations regarding my labraself.
Are you confused yet? I asked momma to clarify a photo from the archives. To whit the following, where, once again, the RH was labeled "lert" whilst I was a "wake." There's something I will ponder at a later date as one word a day is plenty.
As usual, when applied to Dexter, the word morphs into a version that smacks of a patronizing reference to my sturdy, yet diminutive stature. Yes, friends, while the RH is apparently a full blown lert on many an occasion, I have been relegated to "lerting"
The term is applied at the moment when I am attempting to focus on a potential threat to life and limb and I do not appreciate the distraction to my guard dog duties.
And, it is frequently not stated as a declarative, but, rather, as a query as if Momma herself is unclear of the true definition.
"Dexter. Why are you a lerting?"
Here, I am waiting for Master to shake a leg and exit the garage with his bag of goodies from Trader Joe's. Is that what lerts do? Wait for noms?
One can suss out that lerts are a cautious lot as in the sentence (spoken with alarm and dismay) "If I were a lert I wouldn't have stepped in that poo!"
No photo on that one, my friends. Let's just say that in some circumstances the state of being a lert appears preferably to being my heavy footed momma who can count on her shoes to locate poo in the yard with alarming accuracy.
Confounded beyond belief, I offered this photo as one last attempt at clarity from the dotty old hen.
"Are there any lerts depicted here?" I asked.
Her reply? "Awwww, look at my two handsome boys." Hardly flattering to have one's exceptional labralooks bucketed with that 204 pound door stop and certainly not at all enlightening.