Just in time for Father's day, the chemists at Yankee Candle have come out with a new line of candles called (I kid you not)...
Seriously? The scents include 2x4 "The warm, unmistakable scent of planed wood and sawdust."
There is also First Down which is a "combination of orange, patchouli, vetiver and leather as exciting as game day."
Are they for real? And WTF is vetiver anyway?
Well, I, Mango, figured if the idiot humans are foolish enough to shell out dollars for this nonsense, then surely I can come up with a few scents of my own to entice all those crazy dog humans out there to send some of that mullah my way.
Here, for the first time ever, I present:
The Yankee Candle Mango Collection
A fragrant reminder of a fresh April shower.
And of course, my personal favorite...
The tangy sweetness of rotting flesh with a fetid hint of broccoli.
Mango Man! Oh yeah!