Saturday, August 30, 2008

Typical Saturday

I have a VERY important announcement, so pay close attention. Poor Chai had a terrible accident with a bad toy and had to have his tongue amputated! I kid you not. You can read his story here. This is just so upsetting, so please do everything you can to make sure every doggie knows what a terrible toy this is and that it should be removed from all doggie stores.

Phew! Just too horrible to contemplate, so on to happier things.

Its Saturday! And that means the Running of the Errands in my one and only Mastiff Mobile. Hmm... it appears that pee-wee has been hoisting my ride to transport his midget monkey. Dare I enter? I mean sometimes he barfs in the car and he always farts.

But I'm a brave guy, so I got on in.

First stop was the library. As usual, I was on alert as Momma has many outstanding warrants from the library police. But mercifully, the library was closed, so Momma was able to leave her contraband books in the exterior book drop and make a quick escape.I'm trying to settle down for the next leg of the journey, but that monkey is annoying me.Not too many stops today and before I knew it, we were at the dog store! Momma immediately checked for the bad toys (of which they had none) and she alerted them to the danger.

And of course, my car cookie! Today it was a baseball (go Sox). One of the peoples at the store offered to help momma carry out her bags, but she really just wanted some Mango loving (I was too busy with my cookies for smoochie face pictures).

Not only did pee-wee leave his stinky monkey in my ride, but my bed had been moved by almost six inches!!! The Mango does not like change! So I was a bit befuddled on how best to recline and found myself in this configuration.Upon our arrival at the Mango Estate, momma informed me that I was really just a bit too stinky and went for the box of butt wipes. Due to my most generous size, I am ill equipped for performing my own butt licking which would involve feats of limberness that are absent from my repertoire .So I'll admit that occasionally there is some, ahem, accumulation in my nether regions that one could possibly interpret as stinky. Do what you must, woman, but no photos please. Just too personal.OK, I think putting up with that procedure warrants a cookie.Mango Man! Oh yeah!


NAK and The Residents of The Khottage Now With KhattleDog! said...

OH tank woo fur inkhluding the poor Chai story AND fur khommunikhating it to your favourite dog store!

And ummmm - thanks oh so furry much for the mental pikh of Mango and the supersize bum wipes!!


Noah the Airedale said...

Poor Chai, what a horrific thing to happen. You did good making sure the pet shop didn't sell those balls.


Kodak the Eskie said...

There is nothing worse than the poopy butt! I don't get it much, but my mommy's Buster and Clive would get it.

We heard about that bad toy and I'm glad the word is getting out there. So sad.

Hugs, Kodak

Sami & Baylee said...

Hi Mango! You such a handsome face! Your very lucky to have a Mango mobile. Allie is setting beside me and she smile when she saw that I was reading your bloggie and she said, "Tell Mango Man I said Hi." Hi Mango, from Allie. he thinks your adorable. I must agree.
Lovie Dovie~ Baylee

♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥ said...

Mango, we think woo are the only pup we know who has his own personal butt wiper- giggling here about that whole deal.

Woohoo, the OP Pack

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Mango...that's the first we read the whole story about Chai...that's horrific...and for a company to ignore any injury cuz there weren't enough of them?? SHAME.

Our mumsie always seems to have outstandin' warrants from the library too!!! She checked out the Preventing Procrastination book again today...that's our pawsonal favorite when she returns it late!

What does ur momma like to read? Let us know if she can recomment a good keeps Mumsie busy and we can get into more trouble!

Sounds like u and Pee Wee have a totally lovin' relationship! As for the of ur um butt? Buy a cat!


Unknown said...

hahahaha Mango's relentlessly huge nether regions!!!!

That car cookie looks mighty tasty!

Oh, just an FYI - those offending balls were recalled last week! YEY!!!!!

The Pet Connections Blog has the story -

Lorenza said...

Hi, Mango!
Glad you had your Mango Saturday!
I read about Chai's story. It is so sad. I hope they don't sell those balls anymore!
My mom cleans my.... you know what too! And I have to say I don't like it!
Kisses and hugs

Joe Stains said...

that midget monkey would annoy me too, it is probably some kind of spy for Pee Wee to figure out where you go! I am glad your Mom could avoid the library police for one more week! If she was in library jail who would wipe your butt? LOL

Moco said...

Why didn't you do something to that monkey? It had no business in the Mango mobile.
You really got the treats today. Well deserved for not destroying that monkey.

The WriggleButts said...

You most certainly deserve an extra cookie! At least you have a car.. my car was broken into while at the car doctor's and will be needing more doctoring before I can make Mom go get it for me.


Sunny,Scooter, (sometimes Jamie) said...

Gee, we thought we were the only ones hiding from the library police. I think Mom's pic may be displayed under the most wanted list. Aren't they lucky they have us to keep an eye out for the library cops for them?

I read that very sad story. Horrible.


Sunny, Scooter & Jamie(the library slacker)

Molly the Airedale said...

We both get our butts wiped on occassion too, Mango! It's a fact of life at our house!
That's one neat baseball cookie!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Deefor said...

That was a terrible story. We'll check our pet stores too. Change is bad. Especially smelly monkeys and farty puking doggies using your stuff. I understand completely. Why does everything about us have to be so sterile for humans? They don't smell that great.


Girl Girl Hamster said...

That's bad toys sure are scary what they can do to doggies..

~ Girl girl

Mango the Maltese kiddo said...

Thanks for sharing the sad accident of Chai.
Mango, Gussie's mom called me Mango Minor and you, must be the Mango Major. Or Mango Maltese and Mango Mastiff, which one do you prefer?
Finally you settled down in your 6-inches-moved-away-bed with Pee Wee's monkey cuddling next to you.
That's what we call world peace!

Stella said...

Sweet Mr. Mango!

I lament with you over the problems in the nether regions. I too, while limber enough to clean myself, have a bit of an accumulation problem when I am an extra fuzzy girl. So, I've totally been there.

You are obviously a very important part of your mama's errand running. She sounds pretty special, making sure the dog store knows about that evil ball and getting you cookies and all.

Just wanted to let you know that you have more than 1 fan in GooberStan.

Goobery love & tiny kissies,

MJ's doghouse said...

oh are jsut so cute...

Chef said...

OOOOOoooo. Having your butt wiped must be sooo humiliating, Mangoman. I feel for you, buddy. But my Mama feels for your Mama...go figure. Who got the dirtier end of the deal?? Ha ha.
I love you, mybigboyfriend.


The PR Gang said...

You're so funny Mango! And adorable too!