Saturday, November 7, 2009

Dexter Day - I am NOT a Monster (you idiot)

Let me start off by saying that the Relentlessly Huge is a total idiot! I think that covers it.

On tutoring day I was very excited to get going. It was a wee bit frustrating that I didn't get my breakfast, but sometimes when momma knows I am going to be a very good dog and get lots of treats she makes my usual meals smaller, so I figured this was a good sign and eagerly climbed aboard the mastiff mobile.

See that purple thing? That is my good dog attention special toy. Another positive sign, right?

WRONG! Look where we are! Ruh roh.

I am not embarrassed to say I was a bit stressed when I learned of our true destination. Sure, I sometimes get food at the V-E-T, but on Thursday I didn't get any at all. Ruh roh.

Plus momma made me get on the scale which I didn't really enjoy. I am 75 labrapounds.

When we went into the examination room, I tried all my extra cute moves in an effort to turn the tide, but it was not meant to be.

When momma came to get me I felt pretty awful. Then of course when I got home, my idiot brother tried to eat me because of my dumb cone.

What a night. Mango got locked up in the dog cave (why that should be a problem is beyond me since he usually spends the night in there anyway) and momma "slept" on the living room floor while I spent most of the night pacing and (gasp) crying.

Momma had a very sore back the next day (sorry momma) and spent a lot of time in the sleepy room and had to take the ibuprofen.

But now I am feeling much better and back to my old self (even though I am supposed to "take it easy").

I am getting extra walkies.

Jarrod and Mickey had a couple of days off (guess they were tired), so I went out to inspect the progress on the front porch.

My walkies are different than usual.

I appreciate that momma lets me take all the time I want for sniffies, but am frustrated that we go very slowly and not far at all.

It is still Halloween at some houses.

But back home is a different story. When we get inside, momma puts the stupid cone on me again. This is really frustrating because it keeps me from examining my tutoring site.

The worst part, though, is that the Relentlessly Dumb still sometimes thinks I am a monster.

Momma and Master let him out in the house with me and my cone sometimes when they can watch.

But other times he gets barricaded in the dog cave side.

This can make him grouchy, especially when he hears my cone bang against something so I try to stay where he can't see me.

I was afraid he was going to shove the jailhouse chairs out of the way, but fortunately he is too thick headed to figure it out (actually, he could move that big chair too if he had a brain to go with his hugeness).

Of course when I get a cone reprieve, Mango recognizes me at once and is happy to see me.

He even wanted to bitey face with me yesterday, but momma said that we could not do that right now.

When my cone isn't on, momma and master are always watching me. I guess I am kind of interesting.

But when its time to come inside...

Back on goes the cone. Sob.

Dexter done!

P.S. From Momma
When Dex isn't wearing his cone, I leave it on the floor for Mango to investigate. Dex is smart enough to stay away from Mango with the cone as Mango remains unclear as to what the cone monster is, but at least last night we were able to have the boys out together. Poor little Dex went into the dog cave and Mango lay at my feet, but then Mango went to go into the dog cave and spotted the cone monster! I was right behind him. Dexter ran into the corner and growled. Mango seemed totally confused and went all stiff and gave a bark. I grabbed Mango and got him out while my husband herded Dex back into the living room and then everything was OK. Hopefully the cone monster will be gone in a few days and things can get back to normal.


Niamh said...

Poor Dexter.

I am sorry that you have to wear the dreaded satellite dish on your labrahead. Ambrose had to wear one once and while I thought he looked peculiar, I did not bark at him. I hope Mango gets over this and you two can go back to doing lots of bitey face.

Your friend,

D.K. Wall said...

Poor Dex. The Cone of Shame is never fun. Everyone here just makes fun of whoever has to wear it, but no one is ever afraid of it.

Sandy said...

Poor Mango parents, Dexter and Mango. I hope the necessary healing time goes quickly for you all!!

pam said...

Hey Dexter we've got a great idea. Why don't you paint the cone with pretty colors and stripy and then Mango will think you're a clown.

Problem solved. You're welcome.

Bobo and Meja

1000 Goldens said...

Dexter, we sure hope you heal super fast so your humans won't have to worry about you boys. Momma was so good to sleep on the floor with you. Mango Man breaks our heart - it's so hard when you don't understand what is going on. Hang in there buddies...

tula monstah said...

boy oh boy, times are out of sync at the estate. first the little labramonstah invasion and now this! geeshers! I don't Dex, I'm with the Mango on this- probably bark at ya too.

lose the cone! sooner than latah.

toodles, tula

Angel Gracie=^o.o^= said...

Oh Dex what a day you must of had at the vet's place. Not nice that the mom didn't give you the heads up but maybe it was a good thing that she didn't. I hope you don't have to wear the cone thing for too long. It is nice that you don't have to wear it outside or other doggies might make fun of you, not that they should but they would just because it is different. I wonder if Mango is thinking that he might get zoomed to the vet and come back having to wear one of these. Assure him that he is OK and won't have to have one.
What a wonderful mom you have to sleep on the floor to make sure you were comfortable and doing a best as you could. My mom would do something like that too and she would be in bad shape in the morning too from the not so nice floor.
Hope you get rid of the cone soon and are feeling back to normal as soon as possible.

Achieve1dream said...

Poor dogs!

Jake of Florida said...

Dexter, we do sympathize with your present situation -- but as far as the Relentlessly Huge's smarts or absence thereof go -- just remember that Einstein got kicked out of school or something like that. We think RH just has a different kind of smarts -- just like my doofus brother, JH -- so it's better not to judge.

Wirey love and hopes that the old cone will soon be history!!

Jake of Flori-duh

♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥ said...

Poor Dexter and poor Mango- why does life have to be so confusing? Dex, if you don't wear the cone and you do too much studying of the tutoring, you will have to go back to the vet. Mango, just sniff his back end, forget about the cone, and you will know it is just Dex.

Woos, the OP Pack

Sam said...

Mango, you silly man! You STILL don't realize conehead is Dexter?

Martha said...

Oh poor Dexter, it seems you were tricked!
We both get stressed going to the vet!
We don't mind telling you we pee on the floor as soon as we go through the door of the vets!
We know the cone is annoying and Mango is just being silly - you still smell the same. Well with a tinge of odour de vet that neither of us likes!!!!
We hopes you are all better soon.
How nice of your mommy to sleep on the floor - we just get into her bed at such times - that way we can all be comfortable!!!
love and kisses
Martha & Bailey xxxxx

Gus said...

Wooo Dex...sounds like you are feeling a bit better, but since RH is still confooosed by your cone, life is still upended a bit. Hope all resolves soon


Sophie Brador said...

Dex, What kind of surgeries did you have to make you wear that cone? Was it your boy bits?


wally said...

Dex! Welcome to the world of the tutored! My brudder had lots of cone issues in as much as he tried to kill everyone with it. Poor confuzzled Mango. Don't be afraid, Mango! It's just a labraconadork!

wally t.

Golden Samantha said...

It seems like you are feeling a bit better - glad to hear (and see) that you are going for little walkies, but sad to see that Mango is still terrified of the cone monstah. I'm sure things will be more normal (if there is ever that!) over there soon!
Sorry for Mom and Dad tho in the meantime - so tough...
Hugs xo

NAK and The Residents of The Khottage Now With KhattleDog! said...

Just another day in Paradise, Master Chew Sits!

PeeEssWoo: My mom says to tell your momma she did khonsume some AGJ in her honour this other evening!

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Oh's just PEEWEE...not some kinda monster beastie livin' there...perhaps you need to reboot your large and somewhat disturbed brain regarding this issue...

I will be walking Dexter today to give Momma a break...we're going to walk to a movie and go out for lunch...I heard that they are giving out free car cookies today to those who walk...mastiff shaped...

Let your poor momma get some sleep tonight...she's going to get a cold....if she continues being exhausted


Oreo said...

Dexter, Sorry about the cone ordeal, what a pain huh??

It is good to know that you are not an idiot, course we never thought you were anyways.

You would think by now that the Mango would get used to the cone. He doesnt recognize your bark?
Hopefully it will be gone soon and you guys can go at it like usual.


Rocky Creek Scotties and Rocky Creek Ramblings said...

We know you'll be so glad to get that cone monster out of your life. You have to drink a lot of adult beverages before you want to wear a lampshade on your head. BOL!!

Lilly, Piper, Carrleigh and Java

Maxmom said...

What can we say except its tough times(and we understand!) - for everyone in the Mango household. We think Momma needs a medal (and a well-earned rest!)
We hope it all works out soon and everyone is back to their unconfused selves.
Lots of licks

Moose said...

Poor dexter! I am sorry your brother is so dumb! When TeddyNo was here and had to wear a cone I helped my buddy out by pulling it off every time momma was not looking. I even punched some air holes in it for him! Maybe you should ask him to 'help a brother out'?
I guess that won't happen as long as he is sequestered in the cave. Those Chairs would never hold a labradog though, am I right? I hope you get better soon! Teddy had to wear his cone FOREVER because momma said he played too much (not my fault!) and could sometimes reach it so it got infected. So just be good about it so it will heal fast and you can get back to bitey face and fast walkies!

brooke said...

when darwin got spayed, we put the cone on her and took her outside to go potty. And she was so depressed about wearing the cone, she couldnt even use the bathroom with it on.
Hope the cone can be done with soon! And hope your mom can sleep on her bed so her back doesnt hurt again!

Two French Bulldogs said...

Oh dear Lab what a breakfast, no treats, the doctors office, Mango crying, a cone...things could only start looking up
Benny & Lily

Heather and Pumpkin said...

Oh Dexter, when one has a "procedure" done its horrible when they are not properly shielded from the pawparazzi. How embarrassing to have your cone photos leaked to the Internets by your own Mommy. I can recommend a good publicist.


Oskar said...

Poor Dexter. The relentlessly hugs may not have the hugest of brains, but he love you anyway!

Moco said...

This is quite an ordeal. We think we will take a nap and think about all that has gone on at your house.

Sally Ann and Andy said...

Did you have the neutering thing done? I had that done when I was two. I'm sorry that Mango has issues with your cone. Maybe y'all could get cookies whenever you wear your cone. Y'all could nom, nom together.

Linda said...

Poor Dexter. We been there, done that surgery, hehehehe. Sorry Nurse Snickers couldn't come & nurse you, being sick herself, she needs nursing. You should be your ol' self in 2 days or so. You won't even remember what happened. Wow, progress on the porch. Bet your Mama will be happy when it's complete. Hope you have a great weekend.
Luv & Wirey Hugs,
Butchy, Snickers, Ruby, Sylvester & Scuby

animal lover, quilt lover said...

Poor Dexter,
Bambi feels for you. She had her stitches still in her belly when I got her, from her having been spayed. Dexter, Mango will like you again in a few days.
Tell Mom that she did a great job on those pictures!!! Really good pictures!!
Love you Dexter and love you Mango,
Bambi and (cat) Happy and their Mom

The Oceanside Animals said...

The Cone of Shame is nothing but trouble!

Kodak the Eskie said...

So sorry you had to go to the vet Dexter. And really, really sorry you have to wear that cone thingee! I hope you are all better very soon and Mango doesn't freak out at the cone.

Extra hugs, Kodak

Marjie said...

Aw, poor Dexter can't have his brother for comfort. I would cry if my human brothers were not around, just like Mango is doing. Your momma is very nice to sleep on the floor with you, Dexter; my momma whines about "herniated disc", which I think means "I'm too important to sleep on the floor with you." I hope you feel better soon, so Mango won't be scared.

Do you feel more educated with tutoring?


PS: we have a pair of tiny double doors between the mud room and kitchen, which we keep closed for draft reasons, and even though they push aside with one finger, Thor won't nose them open. So it's no surprise that Mango won't move the furniture. Go figure.
-Thor's Momma

The WriggleButts said...

Aww.. Poor Mango and poor Dexter and poor MangoMom. The Mango can be a little bit silly, though, but we appreciate that in a guy. Perhaps you should get one of them thick collars (sort of like the hoomans with neck injuries wear) if you need to keep your snooter out of stitches and stuff, Dexter? Maybe that wouldn't freak out the Mango as much.


Mack said...

When I was a wee pup and my mom Emily had surgeries and had to wear the cone, I chewed it up when human mom was out of the room! I wonder if Mango has thought of that.....

Gus, Louie and Callie said...

PeeWee Callie totally understands that nasty cone thing. She had to wear one of those when she got her zipper put in...
Hope you feel better really soon..

Big Sloppy Kisses
Gus, Louie and Callie

Frankie Furter and Ernie said...

Aw Poor Dexter, Sorry buddy butt this phase is just a RITE OF PASSAGE for us...GUYS. Mom called me BUCKET HEAD. At least you didn't have the other thing done to you too. I came home with no THUMBS and no B_ _ _s. Mango will get over this... heck it's a lot easier than what you just went through. Make sure you bark real deep for a while though.

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Actually, Mango...I was rather disturbed at the "niceness" of your first comment on our tick post...I thought maybe you had gone all soft in the even addressed me as Miss Lacie, an unusually respectful term...

But with the second comment and you addressing me as "Bad Beastie!" I assume that your brain has hardened back to its usual rocklike state...

Nuff said...

I am not a beast...



Molly the Airedale said...

Poor Dexter! We hope you can ditch that stoopid lampshade soon! We know you and Mango will both be much happier once it's gone!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Minnie-Moo (Rescue Lab) said...

Oh dear! We're really glad to hear your op went well Dexter, we've been thinking of you. Sorry that Mango is a bit confused, bless him! Hope you are back to being best friends soon.


The Army of Four said...

Woo, Dexter. Sorry about the lampshade and all. Glad you're healing - you'll be able to ditch that real soon.

Lucy-Fur, as typed by Dr. Liz said...

Oooh. That cone thing looks silly, uh, I meant uncomfortable. But at least you can go on walkies. When I got sprayed, I had to be pretty much inactive for TWO WEEKS!!! (They actually gave me meds to make me sleepy so I wouldn't tear out my stitches, because after the first couple of days? I wanted to RUN!!!) And Mango? You're just pretending to not know it's Dexter, right? Or does he smell different from the meds they used when tutoring him? But don't feel too bad, big guy, I haven't learned how to open doors, even though TaiChi has shown me a zillion times...

*kissey face*

Pee Ess: Mango, Mom said she had to go to Wal-Mart because we are in the Middle of Nowhere, and her shopping choices were very limited. And she wanted to see all the poly-gymnasts....

The Adventures of the LLB Gang said...

Poor Mango, Dexter, Mango Mom and Dexter Dad.....Things need to get back to normal soon in Master Chew Sits!!

Smileys for Healing!

PeeEss...Daddy brought home squirrel pictures from Master Chew Sits and GEE...squirrelies are BIG up there!!!

Lorenza said...

Hi, Dexter!
I hope you will be like new in no time and everything will be back to normal at your house!
Mango will be relaxed, your Mom will have a good sleep and then you will have your fav walkies!
Take care
Kisses and hugs

TwoSpecialWires said...

Awww. Softies that we are, we're feeling bad for you both. Would carrot cake help? Come on over, if so.

How many more days?

Jake and Fergs xxoo

Biggie-Z said...

Poor PeeWee and Mango. hopefully the Cone Monster will go away soon and things will be back to normal. Good job on your tutoring Dexter! You are a BIG BOY now!

Astrid Keel said...

Dexter, I'm sorry you had to wear that horrid thing collar (i think it's more of a torture device than a collar!). And Mr. Mango... well... what can i say? I would be confused too!

Ziggy Stardust said...

Dexter, Your Momma loves you guys a lot cause she stays with you when you are sick or hurting. My Momma does that too, we are lucky pups. I hope you feel better soon and can get back to normal bitey face and all that good stuff.

licks and sniffs, Sasha

The 'splorin' Wolfies said...


ruh roh!

Anonymous said...

Good luck and hope you heal up fast to Mango gets over the whole cone thing. I could totally see Sonja completely freaked out by the cone too (she is also very mentally challenged LOL)

Sunny,Scooter, (sometimes Jamie) said...

o deers. i is da pup. i no that i wil git wat the ladee caled the snip snip a liddol lader on. this ladee i is livin with now, whut sunnee sez is mi nu mom-hmmmm-sed it wuz no big deel. now i see u hav to wear a cone? an fur days! o mi gosh. i hope this ladee wil change hur mind arownd abowt this. geeez.
frum the pup with no name yet. gollee.

Chloe and Libby said...

Dexter I am glad that you are getting some free time from the cone. None of us like that stupid cone either!
Poor Mango, he doesn't realize it's you, too bad.
Ok I'm off to take a nap now,

Unknown said...

Oh Dexter - what an ordeal you're going through!! Poor thing! Wearing a cone is bad enough without having people (well, one dog) abuse you for it!

Anyway, I'm glad to hear from your Momma at the end that Mango seems to be slowly getting a bit more used to it. And hopefully, as she says, it will come off soon.

I also got tutored like you when I was just 6 months and I found it very frustrating doing those slow walks and things too - I wasn't even allowed to run and jump and play like all puppies want to, you know! Well, actually, I didn't listen to my humans and ran and jumped anyway and then I burst my stitches and had to go back to the VET to have them put in again - and then ANOTHER week of cone-misery and no-play...aaarrggghh! So it is better being good and quiet for a few days - take it from me! - otherwise, you end up havign to do it a lot longer!!

Honey the Great Dane
ps. my human says your Master should not have made your Momma send that babygate back - then you wouldn't have needed to rearrange the household sofas to block Mango in the cave! :-)

Joe Stains said...

yikes, this is quite a saga. monsters, cones, tutors, sounds like a good movie.