Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Why I Will be Blogging Even LESS - Many words and ONE picture

Hey, remember when I told you we were getting a foster house? Well, it finally happened yesterday and the upshot for ME is that momma says we will have even LESS time to spend on the internets. I have been watching the whole process unfold and have many words to tell the tale. You can read it if you have time...

A while back momma and master received a piece of paper in the mail that caused great excitement. They said it was something called the Deed to our estate and it meant that they owned it at last. Who knew? All this time somebody called Bank had owned ever decreasing portions of our estate. Gosh, I'm kind of glad I was unaware of that because I would hate to have pooped or peed on something that belonged to somebody else. Er, not really, I do that all the time, but it sounds good when I say it.

Well, shortly there after, during one of the big snows, some dude came to our estate and he looked into every nook and cranny and wrote things down on a big clipboard. I thought he seemed like a nice enough guy. I even let him examine my basket of stuffies.

A couple of days later, Bank called us up and said they would give momma and master a big bag of money. Wow! That sure was nice of them. But then they said that as long as momma and master had the big bag o' cash, they would have to send many dollars of interest (are there boring dollars as well?) to Bank and if they did not give the whole bag back soon enough then that clipboard guy would come back and take over our house and throw us out into the street. That sounded bad to me.

But Master took the bag of cash anyway and he offered to give it to a different guy named Bank and in return Bank would give him a sad little house that nobody wanted to live in. Master said, "Don't worry, Mango, I will make that house all pretty and soon some other people will give me an even bigger bag of cash and I will pay back Bank and even have some dollars left over to buy you lots of stuffies and foodables and maybe even a new bed." Hmmm... that sounds kind of tempting.

Still, the whole thing has caused me a big of heartburn what with all the monies flying about and wringing of hands and mental fits going on around here. Plus I was worried that Master would spend all his time with our new foster house and neglect ME.

Fear not, Master assures me that he will continue to spend his days in the barn building cabinets and moldings and whatnot for our foster home whilst his tool time buddies who have fewer miles on them and a bit more vigor do the heavy lifting.

One of Master's pals is even going to stay at the foster house to keep it company during the rehabilitation and to make sure that no hooligans get it into their heads to pay a visit and scare the hapless little abode.

Along the way, Master has made a new "friend" called Mr. Real Estate Lawyer (as opposed to his partner Mr. Fake Estate Lawyer I presume). I don't think he is much of a friend as he charges Master many dollars just for the pleasure of his company. Worse still, if this Mr. Real Estate even THINKS about our foster house, he sends a bill. That seems wrong.

AND he has Master convinced that he is now a corporation. Huh? How gullible can you get? Master says it is to protect our ass sets in case the house proves to be unadoptable or it hurts somebody. What are ass sets anyway? I am going to do some research because I am not sure Master has any but they do sound like something that would make a nice wedding gift for Prince William, "Oh look, Kate, that charming chap, Mango, from the states has sent us this lovely ass set. Do let's display it prominently at the palace, what?" I look forward to my thank you note.

Real Estate Lawyer asked for even more dollars to check and see if anybody was leaning on the house. "Bah!" says I, "surely we can just drive by in the mastiff mobile to figure that one out." Nope, guess not, because people can lean on a house and be invisible, like hidden in the internets and Lawyer dude found a whole bunch of them who said they would keep leaning until the people who used to live in the house gave THEM bags of money.

Some of those leaners are kind of scary too. Folks like Mr. Infernal Revenues and Ms. Divorce Lawyer. But I do feel sorry for one leaner called Mr. I Came and Fixed Your Burst Pipe in the Middle of the $&*% Winter and You Still Haven't Paid Me Construction Dude.

Are you dizzy yet?

Finally Mr. Real Estate Lawyer made the Leaners go away. It wasn't easy because I think the people that used to live in the foster house spent many dollars they did not have and even after we give them a bag of money for the house they will not have enough left to scare away all of the leaners. That is kind of sad for everybody.

Yesterday it finally happened. Yup, the foster home is now ours to tend to. Which means that Master will be very busy and even when he isn't doing actual work, his mentals and physicals will have fatigue. So no time for him to run errands for us or play tennis ball during the day. Sure, we'll be able to play in the yard and sun bake while he works in the barn, but it isn't the same, is it?

I'm worried that the Pea will resume his rock eating habits so it is up to me to keep an eye out for that. I started doing the annual pruning of the trees and shrubs. I think that was pretty big of me, but Master told me to cut it out. Just trying to help, sheesh.

Momma will be picking up the slack. Don't know what slack is but apparently picking it up is very strenuous because it makes her tired for sure.

All of which leads me to my sad topic which is that we will be most decidedly absent from blog land for a few months. MONTHS! Can you stand it? Oh dear. Lots of mark all as read and few comments and possibly posts from me only maybe once or twice a week (fear not, I already pre-loaded a post for Thursday).

Of course I can't complain, can I? Because Master is super happy about all this and momma is taking me on more walkies to help me with my physical fitness, but I do worry about missing my friends. You all have to promise to let me know if anything really big happens, OK?

While I am not allowed to actually visit the foster house, I will be helping momma post weekly updates and there will be photos coming in a few days to show you what it looks like now so you can keep score at home on the progress.

Big stuff for sure.

Mango Man! Oh yeah!


Donna said...

O hai! Good luck in the nice new house. I will miss u! But I happy for u too. :)

D.K. Wall said...

Mango, you should teach a Flipping class (no, not that kind of flipping, but the fix up this old house and flip kind) because your explanation is so clear. And, boy, do we know about those attorney types who can charge because they sneezed.

We will miss your regular posting, but we thank this is an exciting time for your family. Best of luck.

Amber DaWeenie said...

Sounds like you is in for a very busy and x-citing summer. If da foster house gives you more green papers for new stuffies and a new bed and foodables, it can't be a bad ting, right? So go for it! We'll be checking back for all da updates.

Amber DaWeenie

Gus said...

We will miss you, but shall look forward to the updates on the foster house. Hope all goes well.

Gussie n teka

Unknown said...

Wow that sounds like some busy months ahead of you! We will be here when you get back! Enjoy your walkies!

Frankie Furter and Ernie said...

Holy Gwalk A Moley... your momma and Mr. Master have a Foster HOUSE??? That is sooooo cool. I am sure that it will make thingys all INTERESTing and stuffs.
BUTT... what are we gonna do without YOU and Pee Wee to keep us entertained??? That is most disturbing. I pawmise not to furget you... butt I am afraid YOU will be all busy and FURGET me (Frankie Furter).
HEY... I have an IDEA... I could come BACK and help Mr. Master with all the work in the Barn. I could even make another big pot of Bone Soup and we could talk more about Pawlitics and stuffs... and get the job done FASTER.. with my HELP.
Best of Luck with the Pawject.

Scooter said...

Hey Mango!
Wow, that's just...um, well, wow.
This boggled my puppy mind so I asked my peeps and Mom and Dad tell me this is all okay. Your peeps are doing a good thing, it'll just be a little weird for a while. We will take as much of you as we can get and we'll be waiting for you when you can come visit. Hang in there!
Grr and a Fixer-Upper Woof,
Sarge, COP

Teri and her Stylish Cats said...

A foster house? We never knew houses were looking for furrever homes, hahameow. Your beans will be very busy but this sounds exciting and somewhere in there, some doggie adventures, we are sure!

Cowspotdog said...

Does the foster house have a big yard? I am sure the Mango needs a bigger yard (moor places to poop and such) We will sure miss you but these hoomans have a thing for doing housey stuff and that seems to come first.

Unknown said...

That is so nice that you finally got your paws on the foster house. Mom and I will miss your updates all the times but I suppose that if I hear from you once in awhile that I may not be completely lost. Should we still count on you and Pea for naughty kitty lessons? If so then I will keep record of your name for graduation day.

WFT Nobby said...

Too bad Mango, but it sounds like you'll have to put up with these changes and the limited blog time.
By the way, isn't it odd that in the US you have 'Real Estate agents' whereas in England they are just 'Estate agents' with nothing real about them at all. I wonder what that means??
Toodle pip!

Jake of Florida said...

Mango and Pea, Your tale of ass sets made our mom laugh out loud -- somemthing she doesn't do very often when she has dead lines (if they're dead, why do they matter? we keep asking her).

The two of you have explained thus all in terms quite worthy of Dave Barry -- so we're thinking if the foster house is too much of a strain on your mamma's mentals, then she has a budding future writing stuff for aging comics who need new material.

We'll be waiting eagerly for updates. In the meantime, if you discover any extra ass sets out there, keep them under cover until we can find a suitable recipient!

Wirey woofs!

Jake and Just Harry

NAK and The Residents of The Khottage Now With KhattleDog! said...

There goes the last of the DOH's men-ta(i)ls

Best of lukhk to woo and The Pea!


Infrequent Flyers said...

Hey, I need some legit reasons not to blog so much, too. Congrats on the new house. As long as there's still time for walking and playing with the Pea and the Mango, that's what counts!

Maxmom said...

Gosh Mango, changes are never that fun, even if we try to make them such. Please tell your peeps that we'll miss them, but are looking forward to better times when you guys are back to normal.
Sending lotsaluv in the meantime and if you become aware of a 'warm, fuzzy-feeling', just know that it is our warm wishes, sent across the seas to our special buddies, all the way from Sunny South Africa.
You guys are special. Don't forget we love you lots.

Rocky Creek Scotties and Rocky Creek Ramblings said...

Say it isn't so - we'll go into Mango withdrawal!!

Lilly, Piper, Carrleigh and Ruairi

Golden Samantha said...

Whoa - this is all very exciting news and we will miss you and Dexter HUGELY, but totally get it. Sounds like the sort of work the Master really likes - but do hope you get to do at least a tiny bit of snoopervising! It seems like an RH job that would require your presence (speaking of ass sets! Great pressie for the Prince!) Looking forward to Thursday...

Sammmie, Avalon and Ozzie

Ina in Alaska said...

Congratulations and we look forward with interest on the progress, especially since one of the houses in our neighborhood just had a fabulous transformation. I know you have seen those posts. And that house sold on the first day it was shown.

As a postscript, the new folks in that house....I have not yet done a post on them because I want to wait for them to settle but they have 2 friendly dogs that wander off their new estate (unaccompanied) to meet everyone in the neighborhood. We neighbors are getting all anguished up about it and are wondering when/how to approach these newcomers with this most difficult topic. One dog appears to be a greyhound, the other a black lab like Dexter.

Anyway, great post and glad you got all those invisible leaners out of the way!

Anonymous said...

Months? MONTHS???!!! I dunno how long that is but it sounds loooong. Gosh, I'm sure gonna miss you!

But I think it's awfully nice of your momma and Master to gives the foster house a new chance at a better life. It sounds so sad and lonely and it Most Obviously needs somebuddy to take care of it. So I guess somehow we'll survive without you and Pea. Somehow. For MONTHS.

Oh, and by the way, if you find where you can gets one of those ass sets, would you let me know? My mom's birthday is coming up in a few months and I bet she'd like that. She's always asking my dad if this or that makes her ass look big so I guess she wants a bigger one. And I bet that ass set would help!

Wiggles & Wags,

Molly the Airedale said...

This all sounds very exciting, Mango! We can't wait to see progress pictures! We just know that your master and his tool time buddies will do a magnificent job!

Love ya lots
Maggie and Mitch

Ruby Bleu said...

Wow Mango...that all sounds very complicated! But i think your idea of send off an ass set to Wills & Kate is brilliant!

I can't wait to see the progress on training your new Foster House!

Lots of Licks, Ruby

Kari in Alaska said...

Do we get to see pics of the new foster house?


rottrover said...

Mango and Pea,

We will miss your daily posts, butt if you'll be posting once or twice a week that will be great! Even less frequently, just so we get to continue to hear the RH voice as we read your bloggie and see pics of FH's progress and of you and Pea doing some funballs stuffs. We think this is super exciting and Mom says, "better them than us." Wasn't that nice of her?! Enjoy your Spring and we look forward to seeing pictures of FH.


Tama-Chan, Benny, Vidock, Violette, Ollie, Hotesse & Heloise said...

We are completely dizzy! Hang in there, Boys!

Ms. ~K said...

Very exciting news!!!
We'll be looking forward to foster home updates!!!
You boys be good and help out (and stay out of the way) as much as possible!

brooke said...

we'll miss you, but it sounds like you'll have your paws full for a bit of time! can't wait to see this new foster, and I have to say I do think Prince William would love to display your ass sets at his palace!

CreekHiker / HollysFolly said...

You will be missed!!!

The Army of Four said...

Woo. That whole thing makes my head spin! I wonder if foster houses are like foster huskies? 'Cuz I was a foster here... allegedly... but Mom and Dad failed Fostering 101. I don't know how that works with houses.
Anyway - we love you guys and hope all goes well! We'll miss you!

Smushie Ranch said...

OY! That sounds just like the happenings at Smushie Ranch!!! Small world, eh Mango? Momma says she's in the wrong business, she should be a lawyer too and get big bags of cash from people. Congrats just the same!

The Smushies

♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥ said...

We are really going to miss you and Dexter. We understand but it makes us sad. This is the third blog today that is either shutting down or taking a break. We will be sure to stop by for any posts you can do.

Lots of luck to Mom and Dad with the new foster - it sounds like a lot of work, but it also brings a great sense of accomplishment. Our humans would love to have the deed to this house.

Woos ~ Phantom, Thunder, and Ciara

bbes tribe said...

Wow!! A foster house... what a great thing to do. We didn't know a house could be fostered..
Months!!!! We will miss you, but are looking forward to some updates and to know you are all doing well.

violett said...

All very exciting!
I will you, my great friend, deeply missed.
We look forward to the updates
Lots of love

Anonymous said...

Ooohh it sounds like you and the Pawrents will be very busy for the next few months.

I guess when you have time you can make a list of all the stuffies that you want. BOL

We sure will miss you but look forward to all the pics!

woo woos, Tessa

Cyndi and Stumpy said...

You and dexter will be missed, but we certainly understand the important work the master will be doing. and hey! If it keeps you in kibble and treats...

Noodles said...

Hi Mango,
I will miss you adventures, to be sure, but I understand that sometimes when you don't have thumbs and whatnot, you have to be do what the humans ask of you. In the end it will all be super gooder.
Love Noodles
See you in the Summer.

Oskar said...

My mom person says that her mental hurt just to think about writing that whole story down!

Four months is a long time for a foster house. Can it get it forever people sooner?

Is the company your Master made called Mango-Pea?

So many questions...

Marjie said...

I think an ass set would be a lovely gift for Prince William. I shall hunt for an appropriate display case for it if you send him one. I am saddened to note that my invitation to the wedding still has not arrived, and since you are not posting about your plans to travel to London, I presume yours has not either.

Oh, well, then maybe it's good that your Momma has adopted a Foster House to keep her busy, since she doesn't have to help you prepare for the Royal Wedding. I have a brother Dan who is very talented in the constructions department, and he is looking for a Foster House, as well. It is indeed Big Stuff.

Enjoy your sunshine, Dudes.


Sue said...

We will miss you and Dexter very much, but it's a good thing for humans to have a hobby. It keeps them sharp and tired. You know, of course, a tired human is a good human. Take good care of yourself and keep the seizure monster away.
Your pals,
Morgan, Tsar and the Porties

Lucille, the Great Dane from Italy said...

Wow, big projects in your family!
I am sure you will be very happy in the new house, so please help out your humans as much as you can!
Just drop us a post once in a while to let us know you are ok!
But keep note of what you do in the meantime, we want to know everything you do!!!
Take care and have fun!
Ciao Lucille

Anonymous said...

wow, it's a good thing Loki isn't there, he's a MAJOR leaner, especially against things he loves. Come to think of it, maybe that's why he leans so much. to get beaucoup bucks from people to stop leaning??? (slapping my head) NOW i finally get it!

Stella said...

Dear Mango and Peewee:

This sounds like a fun summer as long as DOH keeps your pool filled and we get frequent updates on Foster's Home. It was fun watching him build the workshop and a whole house will be even better.

Cheers to all!


STELLA and RORY from Down Under said...

Hi Mango, Wow, my mentals are strained just reading about all the changes and adopting a foster house. No wonder Momma needed a break. I will miss you and Dexter but look forward to the occasional blogs just so we know you are all ok. I suppose Momma and the Master just had too much time on their hands and needed a little hobby to keep them busy ha ha. Take care big fella and you too Dex. Look after your Momma and Master and tell them I said, No Worries, love Carol.

Laura and The Corgi, Toller, & Duck said...

Wow, big changes! I hope it all goes as smooth as possible!

And Mango, don't let your momma start slacking in her training with you! No excuses!

houndstooth said...

Are you going to be doing your own version of This Old House? Dad watches that show on Saturday afternoons if we're here at home. I wish you much luck keeping your people in line during this exciting time! We'll miss you!


Amber and Nala said...

Enjoy your blog free time Mango....hope you and Dexter get to do lots of fun things!


Asta said...

I am exhaustewed just considewing all those Bank doodes and lawyew doodes and doodes wif clipboawds and leanews and that poow fostew house..Thank dog that hous is now in youw Mastew and mistwesses safe hands instead of all those awful sounding scaiwy typwes and thank dog fow all those young and fit pals of youw mastews. Of couwse We will miss you like mad, but awe waiting fow that big bag of moneys you will have when you finally find a good home fow the fostew house and all the gwweat toys and tweats and new bed you will be getting. meantime, I'm suwe youw most excellent help wif the Pee Wee and Gawdening and stuff will be a gweat help
Thanks dog fow you Mango!
smoochie kisses

Lorenza said...

I guess I am a little bit confused with your house, the foster house and with what is going to happen!
I think things are different here!
Buuut... sounds very interesting and sure you all are going to be very busy!
I hope everything goes well!
I will be waiting for your post... no matter when you have chance to post, ok?
Take care
Kisses and hugs

Unknown said...

Gosh, Mango - I think that post was a bit beyond my 3-cell Dane brain! I'm not sure i really understand what is going on - other than that your humans are abandoning your blog for some stupid house??!! Sheesh! Where do their loyalties lie??

Anyway, I hope you're not going to totally disappear coz I'm planning a really big contest on my blog soon and I expect you to be one of the leading stars! So you MUST take part - no excuses!!!!! :-)

Honey the Great Dane

Unknown said...

Oh Goodness Mango, we are all going to miss you!!! I for one hope you come back soon! You know, Soph would miss Dexter if she couldn't stare at new pics of him, LOL!

Anyway, hope the house stuff goes amazingly well and quickly, for the sake of all of us out here in bloggy land! :)

Jen and the Black Dog Crew

Maggie Mae and Max said...

OoH Mango,

I will sure miss you and Dexter but mom and me understand. Puleeze stop by and visit when you can cuz months is a looong time fur both of you to be away from us.

Woofs and Licks,
Maggie Mae

Dog Foster Mom said...

That was a great explanation, Mango. I really enjoyed it and learned a lot! My husband wants to have foster houses so he can fix them up and rent them out to make money, but I am afraid it'll end up costing us money in the end, what with those expensive lawyers and all. It is very stressful so just be patient with your mom and dad, and try to keep the Labradork in line for them, okay?

ForPetsSake said...

Oh how I wish I'd been following all along. Your writing is so well done and so funny - I was cracking up!
We've thought of fostering houses ourselves, but have never jumped into the idea wholeheartedly. It sounds like alot of work, but fun work, if there can be such a thing. Working for yourself is so rewarding!
Please keep us posted and in the meantime, I'll be doing some back reading of Mango's doings.
Thanks for your encouraging words on my past post - I can only imagine how with your kid's size the idea of calm, assertive strength has to go a long way ;)

Two French Bulldogs said...

wow, deeds, new house, yippE. Less time with bloggy booooo
Benny & Lily

tula monstah said...

geesh mango.. my headballs is spinning balls. hey, if woo feel neglect just hollah! i'm a jump, skip, and grr away fur funballs.


STELLA and RORY from Down Under said...

Oh Hi Mango, just one more thing. Could you ask Momma for maybe, please an occasional photo of the tool time buddies with fewer miles on them. Just want to make sure they are right for the job. No worries, love Carol.

Molly the Airedale said...

Thank you so much for the jib-jab get well card, Mango! You made us smile :-)

Maggie, Mitch and Sue

Anonymous said...

First off Congratulations on getting the Deed to your Estate! What a wonderful feeling that must be! :D

Now to this foster house... when Mom heard about all the challenges you went through to get it she got a headache, then when she heard about all the work you will be doing to it she got a backache and THEN when she heard you would be mostly absent for MONTHS! she got a heartache.

I sent her back to bed to sleep if off. Silly woman.


PeeS: Will enjoy whatever posties you are able to do :D

Hope your renovations go as smoothly as possible! :)

Golden Woofs! SUGAR said...

Woof! Woof! Totally understand ... will be miss hearing from you. Looking forward to see your weekly updates and photos. Lots of Golden Woofs, Sugar

Princess Patches said...

About those ass sets! Our mom thinks she must have some of those! Oh, wait, I don't think it means a set of asses! Hers just gets bigger and bigger so she was hoping to give away one of her ass sets!

We hope your momma's mentals hold up through the rehab of the foster house! If she gets too crazy, tell her to contact our mom. She used to remodel houses with our dad and somehow, their marriage actually survived it all!

Good luck!

Penny & Patches

doyle and mollie said...

woah thats pretty exciting stuff loves and licks xxxx

Lucy-Fur, as typed by Dr. Liz said...

Dad is a corporation, too. I guess Mom and Dad have sets of ass, too (I thought that was why they went bye-sickleing - to lose some of those sets of ass, but I guess I don't understand...). Mom and Dad also have one of those attorney people that charges eleventy-billion dollars every time Dad even thinks about him (actually, they have another attorney friend who was the best man at their wedding - I'm not sure if he sent them a bill later!).

Anyhoo, I hear you about the "busy" thing. Dad is busy with his corporation thingy (which seems to involve a lot of time on the phone), and Mom is trying to write a book, and so she hasn't been blogging (or even playing on Facebook) as much. *sigh* However, we've been getting snow and frisbee time, and even some walkies now that the Park City Glacier is starting melt.

Take care of yourself, and maybe you can figure out how to post a picture of yourself once in a while, so we can see your smiling face!

*kissey face*
-Fiona and Abby the Hippobottomus

PeeEss: It sounds like your Mom might want to start sniffing glue or something, just to keep her mentals from exploding. I'm just saying...

Lucy-Fur, as typed by Dr. Liz said...

Oh, and Mr. Bank owns most of our house, too, but we still pee and poo with abandon. I mean, it's not like we are peeing and pooing on something Mom and Dad actually own... ;-)

*kissey face*
-Fiona and Abby the Hippobottomus

Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Sheesh...that was a ton of words..

First of all, Mango...slack is when the leash has a loop in it...doesn't happen very often here.

As for you giving Kate and William one of your Ass Sets...

Um...well...I doubt they'll get a double of that present.

Kisses and good luck with the foster home...


Achieve1dream said...

Wow! That's a complicated process to go through to foster a house! No wonder your humans are busy, tired and stressed. We wish them luck and look forward to the updates. Since your comments go to your email we will leave you a comment if something big happens. :)

Peppy Sheppys said...


This is all quite difficult for my big square head to wrap itself around but we hope that it all works out and your Master makes it the best house in Master Chew Sits so you get many bags of money to buy bones and wallymelons.

Otis T.Potus

ps. I had no idea I could get bags of money for leaning! I need to look into this as I am quite good at leaning. If I could get bags of money for sitting, snoring, and snorfling I could buy your foster house!

Jed and Abby in MerryLand said...

AGHHH! We're selfishly anticipating serious Mango withdrawal! Is there a 10-step program for that?

Mama says to stop being so mean-spirited and to wish your peeps the very best of luck with their new project. OK. Now back to us ... we're going to miss you two THHHHIIIISSSS MUCH! Guess we can re-read your complete blog history a few dozen times. Phooey.

Jed & Abby

Richie said...

Well me n Miss Bossy Knickers sure is gonna miss yu big guy butts we will watch our fer your posts when ever d yu can manage dem an will be eagerly awaiting your return.

xx xx

the booker man said...


good gravy! it sounds like the foster house eats a lot of green papers!
we'll totally miss you and dexter while you're away!

the booker man

KB said...

Oh my - your rendition of the whole story had me laughing and laughing, about the loans and the real estate attorney - all of it!

We'll miss you... Don't work too hard.

Kira said...

This whole post had me laughing, but my favorite is the part about how the Real Estate Lawyer sends a bill if he even just thinks of the house! I know some lawyers like that!